Miscellaneous, Plus Size Fashion

Party Pictures

As most of you know, one of the reasons I’ve been largely absent from the blog recently is that I was planning my wedding reception — for 6 months after the actual wedding. In another state. WHILE IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING BOOK TOUR. Boy, am I ever not going to repeat that mistake with my next wedding.

Anyway, the party was a total blast — I honestly didn’t expect to have as much fun at my own reception as I did. For your enjoyment (and to get a post up without my actually having to write anything intelligent), I present the following pictures. I tried to include the best available shots of my dress, which was a custom Jane BonBon — essentially this plus this plus a boatneck, with all the detail tone-on-tone. I cropped Al out of the last one, since he doesn’t like me posting pics of him (even though I have before, oh well), and I left three of my grad school besties in the group shot, because I’m pretty sure they’ve all authorized me to post photos of them in the past, but, uh, HI GUYS IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE HERE E-MAIL ME.

So. Friday night, everyone who was already there met up at a pub, and then a group of the most accomplished drinkers continued on to the fucking ridiculous penthouse suite we got free for a night as part of the hotel’s Please, Please Have Your Wedding Here Even Though There’s a Recession package. Four of the most accomplished drinkers, of course, were Fillyjonk, Sweet Machine, Marianne and me:

As Fillyjonk said, the Photoshopping makes them look both more disturbing and soberer.
As Fillyjonk said, the Photoshopping makes them look both more disturbing and soberer.

The next afternoon, I went out to get my hair and make-up done. Here is the kind of responsible, organized person I am: I made sure to arrange in advance to have my friend Chris show up with champagne for me to sip during this process (see below), yet I completely forgot to get SOMETHING TO PUT IN MY HAIR, which was kind of a crucial part of the planned ‘do.


Fortunately, one of the nice things about throwing a big party is that the morning of, everyone you know asks if you need anything. Naturally, none of them expect you to say yes, but when my friend Jo asked, I was all, “Yeah, could you swing by Target and find me ANYTHING to stick in my hair? Bobby pins with pearls on the end, or the least tacky fake flower available or something?” She accepted the mission — and recruited her husband and our friend Meg to join her — but the poor things got more than they bargained for. Target had squat. Macy’s had squat. Much furious texting ensued, and finally, I was like, “Can you find me a live flower?” Please note that Jo, her husband and Meg were all very much from out of town, so I was sending them running all over a strange city because I was too scatterbrained to remember a hair accessory. That is love, man. And eventually, they came through with something way better than I would have gotten for myself:

I didn't look nearly this good from the front.
I didn't look nearly this good from the front.

Here I am with the three aforementioned grad school friends, illustrating why women with huge boobs are often advised to avoid boatnecks. (On the up side, I was able to wear a full-coverage grandma bra and never had to worry about my boobs falling out of the dress — or about the traditional Beginning of Summer Heat Rash I had all over my chest. Woo hoo!)

Hence the term "Rack of Doom."
Hence the term "Rack of Doom."

Here are Sweet Machine and Fillyjonk, all gussied up and minus heads. (FJ ‘shopped the other one for me, but my skills are limited to inelegant cropping.) Fillyjonk scored that dress at Marshall’s a few hours before the reception, and I cannot believe it fit her that perfectly off the rack. NOT THAT I’M BITTER OR ANYTHING. She was shedding glitter everywhere all night, but she looked amazing — as did Sweet Machine, who is wearing a dress she got at Vive la Femme, in case any in-betweenies are wondering if it’s worth a trip. (Also, when I did the reading there, the friend at the far right of the pic above — who I think wears about a size 4 or 6, usually — managed to find a 0x top that looks great on her. So the bad news is, some “plus-size” designers are fucking looped in terms of sizing, which we already knew, but the good news is, if you’re a smaller fat or even a non-fat, you might be able to find something at Vive.)

HEADLESS FATTIES FROM THE INTERNET (except for how one of them's not fat)
HEADLESS FATTIES FROM THE INTERNET (except for how one of them's not fat)

The dome thingy where we did cocktails and dancing (at the Millennium Hotel Minneapolis, if anyone’s looking for a venue) looked awesome once the sun went down, as did Marianne. Well, she looked awesome in daylight, too, but I love this picture. Her dress is from Torrid — I believe it’s this one.

Head-ed fatty from the internet!
Head-ed fatty from the internet!

Al and I both brought comfy shoes to change into, but holy shit, I waited too long. I mean, my original shoes were fairly sensible, all things considered — Naturalizers with only about a two and a half inch heel. Problem is, I have plantar fasciitis in my right foot (or at least, I’m 99% sure I do — have never gone to a doctor about it), which almost never bothers me because I wear flats with ridiculous arch support 99% of the time. But when I wear heels? It always bothers me for a day or two afterwards. When I dance in heels for two straight hours before remembering I brought flats to change into? Turns out I wake up the next morning, take one step, scream in pain, and seriously consider sending Al to CVS to buy me a cane. (I managed without one — it’s always worst right upon waking, and the pain soon downgraded itself to a non-screaming level — but I was limping for a day and a half. Definitely the worst foot pain I’ve ever had, which probably means I really should go to the doctor and get custom orthotics instead of relying on Danskos and Mephistos to keep it at bay.) Anyway, these (Borns) would have been great, if I’d put them on sooner:

ow ow ow ow ow
ow ow ow ow ow

And finally, we arrive at the end of the evening, where I am soaked with sweat from dancing all night — turns out when the playlist is almost all songs you picked, you’re not as motivated to take a break as you might be — looking both happy and slightly evil, which kind of sums up my relationship with Al.

Sweaty fat girl!
Sweaty fat girl!

There you go, Shapelings. I wish you all could have been there, except that would have been really expensive.

Now that I’m done with the planning process, I’d like to say I’ll be around more often, but honestly, I just started working on another book proposal, so don’t hold your breath. In the meantime, FJ, SM, and AS will be doing what they can, and you can use this thread to talk about whatever you feel like talking about.

70 thoughts on “Party Pictures”

  1. Eep! Congratulations (again)! Everyone looks amazing and like they’re having a great time.

    For the foot pain, if you know you overdid it the night before, when you wake up the next morning, massage your foot and stretch it out before you stand up (rub the bottom of the foot, pull the toes back to stretch out the ligaments; the best is to to a towel stretch where you hold the ends of a short towel in your hands and then extend your leg to stretch the foot and the ankle).

    Then when you go to stand up, put your shoes on first and don’t put your weight onto your feet until you have arch support underneath. You’ll still feel pain but it should be much more bearable, and will fade as your up and around.

    (Also anti-inflammatories are good to have on hand. My one podiatrist suggested taking a bottle of water and keeping it in the freezer – you could roll it under your foot so the cold salved the pain while also keeping your ligaments loose.)

    DRST who has major heelspurs in both feet from having PF for about 20 years.

  2. That’s a damn nice headless fatties photo there! (Although I like the photoshoped-headed fatties better ;) )

    Was it worth the planning insanity and post-shindig limp? Looks like it was!

  3. You all look beautiful, even those of you with no or cartoon heads!

    Marianne totally glows in her photo.

    Congrats Kate and luckiest man alive Al!

  4. Awesome pics.
    Someday, perhaps I too will have a photoshopped cartoon photo of myself with you and Marianne. (I’m such a fan!)
    Happy, happy, happy — and I hope you have an enjoyable busy upcoming time, too.

  5. i love. i love everything – the sheen of dupioni silk in your dress and how radiant you look, FJ and SM looking smokin’ hot in blue (did you guys plan to match up ON PURPOSE?), marianne all super-sassy in pink, al’s chucks, the awesome dome, fantastic friends who brought you orchids – everything. i hope, when my own wedding comes round, it’s as cool as this one.

    also, FJ? i may have to steal your shoes. fair warning. ;)

  6. I love the sweaty and slightly evil, although photo-shopped heads are my second fav. Congrats again! I remember my reception fondly, and it sounds like you are going to as well for many years to come.

  7. What a beautiful, glamorous, fun, awesome crowd of women. YAY! Thanks for sharing the pix.

  8. Here, have some completely unsolicited plantar fascitis advice!

    1) Get one of those foot-rolly things and roll your foot on it. Like, you can get wooden ones in Chinese dollar stores, sometimes, or you can even just use a wine bottle. Massage under the arch of your foot.

    2) Stand on a towel. Using your toes, scrunch the towel up under your foot. You’ll be able to scrunch about 1/4″ inch with each movement. Keep scrunching til it’s awkward, then flatten the towel out and start again.

    3) Stretch out your achilles tendon. Tightness there can exacerbate PF. Best way I’ve found is, while waiting for a bus, to stand with my heels off the edge of the gutter, and hold on to a signpost for balance. One foot at a time works best. Stretching the rest of your legs doesn’t hurt either; flexibility all through there will make your feet happier.

    Your PF sounds about the same badness as mine was: worst in the mornings, managed by sensible shoes and the odd ibuprofen. I went to a podiatrist and he gave me all the above tips and some orthotics. The PF went away after about 3 months, and I stopped wearing the orthotics. Since then it’s occasionally threatened to come back, but doing the stuff I listed seems to keep it at bay.

  9. Kate, I had a lot of trouble with plantar fasciitis. I too considered orthotics, but on reading that I would have to put them on first thing and wear them all day, i just rebelled at the thought. I have my horse ‘barefoot’ instead of shod, and the benefits of this are said to be seen all over the horse’s body. Putting stiff shoes on myself all day long seemed like the completely wrong direction to be taking for myself. So, instead, I went barefoot as well. It has been amazingly helpful. My feet are much healthier, and a side bonus is that I don’t get cold feet at bedtime any more. I think the circulation is much better. My knees are also a hundred percent better.

    When I *must* wear shoes I wear volleys, which are totally flat and very flexible. Even a tiny heel sets all of your balance wrong.

    The other thing is that plantar pain actually stems from a tight bit of muscle in your calf. It is called a trigger point and usually you can find it easily by poking hard with your thumb into an area just below your knee, on the back of your calf, a little inside of centre. You’ll find a really hard, really painful little or big bump there.The best way to treat it is to lie on your back and cross your sore leg over the other one with your knee raised, and use your bottom knee to rub the sore spot on. If you are doing it right, it’s very painful. :) Do it about ten times each time, and as many times in the day as you remember.

    Anyway, just wanted to save you from clumping around in unbending frankenstein shoes all day long! There is lots of info on barefooting on the web. It’s a bit of a revolution.

    ps, Glad you had so much fun at your reception!

  10. I kept meaning to tell you how much I loved your choice to use a live flower for your hair. So pretty and summery! And also not your doing so good job having smart friends! :P

  11. Kate, you might want to change the alt text of the headless photo of Fillyjonk and Sweet Machine.

  12. OMG, I finally get to see what you wore! The anticipation almost killed me.

    I love that dress!! Kate, you look so gorgeous! And everyone else there looks beautiful, and it looks like you had a rockin’ reception. Congrats!

  13. Pretty, pretty hair, Kate, and you’re wrong. The front view of you is just as pretty (and I have no idea why you’re complaining about the boatneck). You look like you had a wonderful night.

    Also, I want SM’s dress. That’s exactly the sort of summer dress I’ve been looking for and can never find.

  14. Kate, those “comfortable” shoes are gorgeous. I’m such a shoe wimp, I would have worn those all night. Then again, I’m a wee bit taller than you, so flats tend to work for me. Everyone looked great. The venue looks amazing. Way to fete!
    Also, new book proposal? Squee!

  15. I love that dress. I could actually wear that dress. OMG, if I had money I could get that dress in my size! Very affordable for a formal dress in silk too. Kinda makes me wish I’d actually had a wedding ceremony.

  16. I tried that blue plaid top on the other day when I was in H&M. Hooray for sales, too bad it didn’t look nearly as good on me as it does on SM. :)

  17. I love your dress – and everyone looks fabulous!

    I used to have plantar fasciaitis (spelling?) and was given orthotics by my podiatrist. I didn’t wear them all day everyday, but after about 4 months the pain was gone, and hasn’t come back since. I still wear them with my gym shoes, but otherwise not. I realise this is just my personal experience, but might be something you want to look into.

  18. Oooh! Pretty dresses, smiling people, in Minneapolis, which is fab, with booze! Lovely!

    I was going to say “the best thing about these photos is that you are charming and pretty and happy and wearing a lovely dress with lovely flowers in your hair and all your comrades are smiling and looking like they are having fun. And your smile is a little eeeeeevil. Perhaps an eeeevil grin, even.”

    But then you said it first.


  19. I’m such a shoe wimp, I would have worn those all night. Then again, I’m a wee bit taller than you, so flats tend to work for me.

    Yeah, and I’m not only short in general, I’m a foot shorter than Al. Even when I had the heels on, the photographer made him lean against a wall and crouch down awkwardly so she could get both of our heads in the frame the way she wanted. :)

  20. Yay, that looks like it was a blast! I’m loving the creative photoshopping and cropping too. Haha! :) Congrats again!!!

  21. Yeah, and I’m not only short in general, I’m a foot shorter than Al. Even when I had the heels on, the photographer made him lean against a wall and crouch down awkwardly so she could get both of our heads in the frame the way she wanted. :)

    Teehee. This reminds me of a friend of mine who is engaged to a girl who is about six inches taller than he is. When they had engagement photos taken, the photographer made him stand on a box so that he’d look taller. It was so silly.

    Lovely pictures, Kate. It looks like all of you are having such a great time.

  22. Arwen, it’s actually not re: fat, but re: grief. It’s an idea I’ve been thinking about for a long time, and although I originally intended the next book to be at least semi-fat related, to act as more of a bridge between what I’ve done and the million other subjects I’d like to write about, I decided I’m geeked enough about this idea right now that I’m going to write up a proposal and see if I can do anything with it. (That’s a big “if,” mind you.)

    Of course, talking about mortality and grief does involve a lot of talking about the way we view our own bodies and health, so a lot of the fat stuff still applies. But this would be a pretty big departure from the blog and the first book.

  23. You look GORGEOUS! I love the design and color of your dress (and your awesome rack.) The fabric is lush. You look like you all had a blast. Everyone’s dresses are so beautiful. (One of these days, I’m going to have to buy a dress!)

    I had PF of the foot too which annoyingly seemed to crop up more just when I feel like I’m getting on top of exercising. It’s one reason I’m doing yoga now instead of a treadmill. It helped to get quality shoes to walk in and exercises (like the ones others have described) made a real difference.

    New book? Yes Yes Yes.

  24. You look lovely and happy. And FJ and SM look exactly how I imagined! They photoshop well.

    Jane BonBon made you a beautiful dress. Thanks for giving us the scoop on the fashions.

  25. Yay! So glad that you had a better time than expected (always a strangely hard thing to do at your own reception), and you all look *fabulous*.

    I ditto the advice on PF – mine was ok for about a year, but got superbad after I started walking across a bridge each day as exercise. For me, tight achilles tendons were the main culprit, so the doc’s recommended stretches removed the problem entirely. I hadn’t realized HOW MUCH BETTER no pain is than ‘manageable’ pain. I hope that either the reams of unsolicited advice help you out, and/or you get to a good doc who can help with your particular situation. Pain sucks.

  26. Mazal tov again Kate (and Al, of course). Love the photos, love the flower in the hair, love the dress and rack–as always, love the sweaty face, love the evil grin…is it strange to feel so happy for someone I’ve never even met?

    (And my deepest sympathy on the foot pain. No PF for me (thank the universe), but I’ve had my share of foot issues and hurting. My wishes for a full and speedy recovery.)

  27. I’d look forward to reading a book by you on other topics. We are all more than our pant size! Good luck with the proposal.

  28. It sounds like an absolutely wonderful party — and you look both happy and gorgeous in those photos! Congratulations!

  29. Love the pics!

    Godless Heathen, the whole thing this week is the Onion “food and dining”issue. I am laughing my ass off.

  30. I am SO glad to hear that the funny rash on my boobs is just beginning-of-summer-heat-rash and NOT rash-like, heat-induced cancer. Phew!

    I live on the West Coast – actual heat is optional during any given summer.

  31. Ooooh you look fantastic and most importantly so happy! I’m so happy for you Kate. You deserve all of your wonderful success – with your love life and your career – and I’m glad to have cyber-witnessed these great evens on your blog :)

    And on a side note – it’s nice to see another couple who did something like what my husband and I did (we went and got hitched without inviting anyone, and then much later had two fun parties to celebrate it – one for family, one for dancing with drunken friends).

  32. Kate, you’re looking pretty good, especially in the standing shot. Sweet Machine is looking damn incredible!!

  33. This totally makes me want to plan my own wedding. Now, if I could only talk the fiance into it.

  34. Also, I love how the hairdo shot from the back looks like you’re inches away from being devoured by a model.

  35. Congrats! Much happiness to you and Al in the years to come.

    Everyone looks great, and I want all dresses and shoes pictured.

  36. I love your pictures, and you look so happy and beautiful. Congratulations!! It looks like it was a blast!

  37. Congrats! You look lovely. The dress is gorgeous (I’m noting that seamstress) and it looks like it was a fab party.

    Sorry about the feet, though. I was lucky in that I bought a gorgeous, but nearly flat (1″ heel) pair of shoes for my wedding that turned out to be so comfy I never took them off to wear my wedding Chuck Taylors. I was very determined to dance and not have aching feet at my wedding.

  38. Congrats on your wedding. You looked great in your wedding party outfit too. I just wanted to thank you for your great book, Lessons From the Fat-O-Sphere. It was an even better read than I had hoped. Thanks so much.

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