Sad news and a call for help

Friend of the blog Heidi, who wrote one of our most memorable guest posts about a year and a half ago, could use some support from the SP community right now. 

On Friday, her father committed suicide. (Her heartbreaking and potentially triggering first post about it is here.) He was the primary breadwinner for the family — Heidi and her mom both have chronic health problems that limit their ability to work. Now, with no insurance and no savings, they’re dealing with burial costs and will likely have to move in the near future. They don’t know how they’re going to manage, and they’re obviously both terribly traumatized right now.

I know money’s tight for everyone, but if you can spare anything, she’s accepting donations via PayPal here. There’s also a mailing address at that link if you’d like to send a card. (As she says, “Mail that isn’t bills would make me so super happy.”) Huge thanks to anyone who can help out. And huge love and sympathy to Heidi and her mom from all of us at SP.

26 thoughts on “Sad news and a call for help”

  1. I donated a small amount – just $10 – but I really hope it helps, if nothing else then with a little faith in the good of the world. Since I have never heard of Heidi or her blog before, I was surprised at how compelled I was to help her when reading her entry, but having just contemplated to spend that $10 on pizza tonight without thinking twice, I couldn’t NOT donate.

  2. I don’t have anything to give right now aside from heartfelt sympathy and tears. How horrifying. Heidi, I’m thinking of you.

  3. Kate, thanks for helping Heidi by linking. I wish I had money to send, but I will definitely send a card. When my dad passed away, every little bit–monetary and/or support-wise–helped, and just reading the cards that people sent was almost cathartic. My thoughts are with Heidi and her family.

  4. I sent what I could for the time being and hope to send more when payday rolls round this week. My biggest fear is that my mum will do this one day. I’ll see if I can’t send something nice in the post, too.

  5. Sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks after reading this and the WSL post.

    Fuck it, I get unemployment, I can afford something.

  6. Fuck it, I get unemployment, I can afford something.

    Well, and even if you can’t, I’d like to second ampleproportions’ comment about sending a card or a letter. When I’ve had deaths in the family, I’ve been shocked at how much comfort getting a sympathy card could bring—they seem cheesy and inadequate in theory, but having someone reach out and acknowledge your loss completely outweighs the Hallmark factor.

  7. Thank you for passing this along. One of my dearest friends lost her mother (also sole breadwinner) to suicide back in April. I’ll definitely pitch in a little—I remember how absolutely leveling this experience was for my friend, and I’m sure that’s how it is for Heidi.

  8. Jesus. I’ve read all of Heide’s posts, although I rarely comment. She’s had a hard time and this – there are no words. I’ll send something on payday. That poor family. It’s unbelievable.

  9. I can’t help out financially, but I did repost this in my own livejournal, to see if anybody who reads it can. My thoughts and prayers are with Heidi and her family today.

  10. Dear God. There are no words…. Yes, we’ll chip in once we’re back from our houne-hunting trip. ((((Heidi)))), I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine the grief.

  11. it is strange for words to fail me.
    heidi, i’m so sorry.
    if there were any words of comfort, they would probably be here. the commiseration sort of comfort, anyway.

    hang in there. you will get through this one minute at a time. just remember, when it gets almost impossible, that you only have to make it another minute.

    jesus, i’m so sorry the word sorry sounds like nowhere near enough.

  12. What a nightmare. My God. I can’t even imagine what you are enduring. I’m praying for you, Heidi.

    Thanks for posting this, Kate.

  13. My heart goes out to Heidi and her mother (along with the $20 that was all I could spare at the moment). I can’t even imagine.

  14. I got a link to that post on my LJ friendspage, and was absolutely horrified by what Heidi and her mum are going through. I’ve donated what I could, and will make a card and send it. What an indescribably shit situation. Thank you for posting this, Kate.

  15. I am new to blogging and new to WordPress. When I checked in today I read about Heidi’s father, and then I read her blog about WLS. Heidi, when we think it can’t get any worse, sometimes it does, but I hear a strength in you that has been awakened by your difficulties. Believe that in your pain, there is a strengthening of the spirit, and be the example of life God seems to have chosen you to be. Prayers and Hugs.

  16. Heidi
    I can’t imagine how bad you are feeling right now. I lost a dear friend to suicide a few years ago, please believe me there is light at the tunnel. Lots of tears too, but I guess you know that.
    Lots of love and hugs to you and your family xxxxxx

  17. Dear Hallie,

    I lost my dad to suicide in April 2008. Don’t say “hang in there”. It’s potentially triggering to someone who lost someone to hanging. My dad drowned himself. It’s triggering for me to hear “I’m drowning in X”. Think about the language first.

    This goes for everyone.


  18. paypal isn’t working for me for some reason, but heidi’s getting a good chunk of the money i got for completing my undergrad.

    words are failing me, so hopefully e-hugs will suffice

  19. Dear Rebecca

    My best friend hanged herself and Hallie’s language was not triggering. For me, it’s imagery – movies, pictures, acting. But it’s worth mentioning, as it’s been 4 years since it happened so I’m not as badly affected as I used to be.

    Much love to you and all the survivors here xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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