Dieting/WLS, Fat, Self-Image, Sweet Machine

You say “freak of nature” like it’s a bad thing

A pattern I’ve noticed with trolls, snarky linkers, and even friendly dissenters who take issue with our “Don’t You Realize Fat Is Unhealthy?” post is that some people really, really don’t like the following statement:

Diets don’t work. No, really, not even if you don’t call them diets. If you want to tell me about how YOUR diet totally worked, do me a favor and wait until you’ve kept all the weight off for five years. Not one year, not four years, five years. And if you’ve kept it off for that long, congratulations. You’re literally a freak of nature.

Something about this paragraph makes people’s brains explode. I can’t tell you how many trollish comments I’ve deleted or silly trackbacks I’ve followed that say something like Well I guess I’m just a FREAK OF NATURE then, Kate Harding! Despite the fact that, as we know, diets are designed to fail and that the vast majority of dieters put weight back on as soon as they start indulging in those fattening carrots and glasses of milk again, the dieters who are just so gosh-darned proud of their lithe bodies that they MUST come set us fat-lovers straight cannot handle being called “a freak of nature” even though they’re, by any measure, statistical anomalies.

You see, successful dieters aren’t the Freaks of Nature. Fatties are the Freaks of Nature! (Results not typical.)

The whole mindset of rewarding yourself for self-hatred and denying anything that might be remotely pleasurable is predicated on the attempt to escape that dreaded label, freak. Though the beauty/thinness ideal is incarnated by only a handful of people in the world, that ideal labels anyone outside the mainstream a freak, an abnormality, less than fully human. The desire to fit the beauty ideal is to erase that scarlet “F” (fatty, freak, dare I say female?) from one’s body. So when we say to those few people whose diets have stuck for over five years, or whose WLS operations didn’t leave them fatter and less healthy than before, hey, you guys are the real freaks, they feel like we’ve slapped them in the face and kicked their puppies and stripped them naked all at once.

Here’s the thing, though. We like freaks. We are freaks! Publicly embracing fat in a fatphobic society means publicly declaring yourself a freak, even if your fat body actually makes you something close to “normal.” We’re all freaks of culture (freaks of nurture?) here.

Attention, freaks of nature: We are against the status quo. We don’t believe that normal is good. We believe the division of “normal” and “abnormal” people, of default and deviant people, is profoundly harmful to individuals and to the culture at large. If you’ve invested your sense of self-worth in finally escaping the scarlet F, to the extent that someone pointing out your statistical unlikeliness makes you feel attacked, you’ve been putting all your hard work into the outer part of yourself and not enough into the inner part.

We’re all freaks here. You don’t need to freak the fuck out about it.

61 thoughts on “You say “freak of nature” like it’s a bad thing”

  1. Word, sweetmachine. I proudly embrace the scarlet F. I’m a 5 foot tall infertile woman scientist who eats when she’s hungry, eats until she’s full, and refuses to demonize any food or behave in a socially acceptable way toward food (i.e., be irrational about it or afraid of it aka weight-loss diet).

  2. Somewhat off-topic, but this is a snippet of a comment that I just left over at Bitch Ph.D:

    “One thing I love about Shapely Prose is that there, thinking you’re beautiful /= thinking that you’re not all THAT far off the mark from the ideal after all, even though you may have thought so previously. It doesn’t mean finding a way to believe that you got a higher beauty grade than you previously believed. It just means thinking you’re beautiful. Because you are. Who the hell’s to say you’re not? There’s no universal law of physics that fat thighs or a post-two-kids belly can’t be beautiful; and anyway, I don’t owe you a damn thing, Mr. Would-Find-Me-Hot-If-It-Weren’t-For-X.”

  3. I totally want a scarlet F, but I’m an inbetweenie. Can I have a scarlet I? Or – HANG ON THIS IS THE BEST IDEA I’VE HAD ALL YEAR OH MY GOSH!!! – a pink F, like how the Red Hat ladies have pre-menopausal women under fifty wear pink hats?

  4. Yeah, you guys totally need my mad art skillz to design a t-shirt with a big red F on it. ;)

    I’ve got some other new designs I need to finish for the store too. Like, that I started months ago. Sheesh. Get on it, FJ.

  5. Ooo…You know I have been thinking a lot about the FA movement…and then I came across a book called “The Beauty Myth” …All this about the “ideal beauty” is just a way to keep women down and against each other…or so the book says. It talks about how when women went to work in masse and the feminists started to try to bring about change, some people got scared of the changes and started perpetuating the beauty myth…that is why most women’s magazines have tons of weight loss ads and articles as well as ads for this cream to keep you looking younger or that product to keep your hair from looking gray.

    It is so persistent that now even men believe it…even though beauty is subjective, they still have been carefully cultivated to believe it so as to perpetuate it among women…

    When people stop attacking each other and stop falling into this trap of what is beautiful (health isn’t an issue bc my health is none of your damn business) then all this craziness would stop…

    However, I have to wonder if that is why this “obesity epidemic” came about…because companies were starting to lose money and now they have to hype up a new scare to keep our monies flowing out of our pockets and into theirs……


    :shakes fist at computer screen:

    Seriously, though, when I was in high school my friends and I – basically the dorks of the school, though my high school was actually pretty compassionate and dorkiness was just one of many ways to be kind of endearing – made a club called the F Society. Every year we had an annual Farbecue where we served foods that start with F. We had a flag. And a salute. And an anthem! I can’t remember the first verse, but the second and third verses went:

    Some letters have their own words, such as I, O, U, and B
    But as for F, one only can be hung in effigy.
    An F on your report card means a failing grade in school.
    It’s also found in words like “filth” and “fiend” and “fart” and “fool.”

    We’ve now explained the purpose of the F Society.
    We feel that it’s been treated with such impropriety.
    So join right in and sing with us, in bass and treble clef,
    A chorus full of praises of our friend the letter F!

    (I think I mangled the words in the last two lines, but that’s the gist, anyway.)

    Incidentally, the person who wrote that anthem went on in musical theatre and has a show off-Broadway now. I don’t know whether I should mention her name or not.

  7. YAY! *clap clap clap* A Sarah, that is pretty freaking AWESOME. What show is it? Incidentally, my cousin, who also just wrote a musical, had gone to school and seen the show that is now “In the Heights” in workshops…crazy!

  8. Awww, Zaftige, thanks. I just emailed the composer and asked a) for the complete lyrics, and b) if I could “out” her as the author, assuming it wouldn’t damage her professionally. Stay tuned!

    Another random musical theatre connection with all this is that Scott Bakula is actually a member of the F Society, as is Mandy Patinkin. Because all you had to do to be a member was to do the F salute. So the two famous people I ever met, I made a point of inducting them. They thought I was nuts, I’m pretty sure.

    Gosh, F — fat, freak, female, feeler (in the Meyers-Briggs sense), feminist, fart-humor-enthusiast… there sure are a lot of wonderful modifiers beginning with F.

  9. Okay, here’s the first verse:

    We’re here to talk to you about our very worthy cause
    In all the English language, this is one of many flaws
    Our founders and supporters stand together, for we feel
    The letter F is noble and deserves a better deal

  10. I’ve read that page a few times, and I’ve never been offended by it. However, I could see how others might be.

    “Freak” literally means someone who has something unusual about her appearance. It isn’t unusual for a person to be slender or fit. It’s not unusual for a person to be overweight.

    I think the movement would do itself a disservice if it declares everyone a freak. Why not use a more positive term, like individual?

  11. Good job on this piece, Kate. (totally kidding, I know FJ wrote it)
    Anyway, I think that people have been totally conditioned to believe that statistics are the irrefutable truth (which we know is not always true) As such, I think when they come to this site, and they see that not only do you have opinions, but you back them up with studies and *gasp* empirical evidence, it blows their mind. And what do most people do when they get confused? You guessed it, they get angry. The fact is, as you said, anyone who has lost significant weight and kept it off is indeed a statistical anomaly. That’s a fact, not a moral judgment. I don’t think some people know the difference between the two.
    Also, spouting numbers and statistics happens to be my favorite method of shutting up the haters. You would be surprised how many people have no idea why they have the opinion that they do. They haven’t worked for their opinion, they have gleaned it from the evening news. Not so with the majority of people on this site. You just have the courage to say it out loud, and people don’t like that, they hate it in fact, because it reminds them of what they don’t have. Like crabs in a pot. Annnnnnnnnd, I’m done now. Sorry for the long post, it’s one of my pet peeves.

  12. More people need to accept their freak, like this lady who is suing restaurants in Seattle over their “low fat” menus:

    “I would go in and weigh in and the scale, and the lady behind the counter would say ‘you’re up 2 1/2 pounds,'” she said. “And I would say, ‘but how could I be? I’ve been eating according to my plan.'”

    Paskett, who is on Weight Watchers, believes her plan was derailed by well-known restaurants falsely advertising low-fat meals.

    Send her an F, stat!

  13. That’s a fact, not a moral judgment.

    Exactly. It’s the same logic behind saying “fat” is a neutral word — it’s a descriptor, not an epithet.

  14. The whole time I read this post- the song We Are the Champions by Queen is playing in my head and I am reliving the scene at the end of Revenge of the Nerds. “We have news for you, the beautiful people…” lol!

  15. A Sarah, I wish your high school had been mine. I was a freak because I was scarily thin no matter how much or what I ate and I read constantly. I got through, but I don’t remember much of it fondly. That’s why I maintain that the high school years (or the middle school years, I’m torn) are the worst. Trapped with no control over who you associate with and many of the adults believing that ‘pain makes you stronger’. I’ll tell you what makes you stronger, having a club with a great song!

    I was saying something like this about high school in my Organizational Behavior class the other night which is taught by the Tool of the Year (racist, sexist, living exemplar of what not to do) and he said, “I don’t know that I agree with that, I had a good time in high school.” It was all I could do not to say, “I’m perfectly sure that’s true.”

  16. You know…I’m a moderately fat girl, typically between size 12-14. I got pregnant and have gained an average of 8 pounds every four weeks until this last visit. This last visit I only gained 4lbs. My current pregnancy weight is 212lbs (BTW – I have not told ANYONE this…so yeah…despite months of reading this site, I still show signs of shame for being a fatty).

    I am not sure what my point is here, but, prior to the pregnancy I worked out reguarly and ate well. I never lost a pound, regardless of altering my diet or if I increased my workout regime or length. I too lost major amounts of weight in my early 20’s….achieved by gym visits in the 2 hour range and near starvation otherwise. I know I won’t EVER return to a size 4 and I am ok with that. I am attempting to prepare myself for what I’ll look like post pregnancy and wishing, hoping and praying that I’ll fit back into my 12-14’s again. But if I don’t fit into them, OK, I’ll move on to a size that does fit and won’t look back.

    I am a freak who lost 50lbs and managed to gain it back. By now I have gained it back and then some. But you know, I find it pressing to hate myself for it anymore.

  17. I am totally crying with love for this post.

    I’ve always felt like a freak. From puberty to about 16, I thought it was because I was fat. After an enforced two years of WW, I had dropped from 225 to about 150, and at 5’3 was as skinny as I would ever get. Definitely down to where everyone else wanted me to me. But I was getting dressed to go out one day, and looking at myself in the mirror, I realized with dawning horror and panic that losing all that weight didn’t make me feel any more attractive or like any less of a FREAK.

    [And just for the record, I most definitely did NOT get any more attention from boys at a lesser weight. It wasn’t until later on in college when I was fatter than I had ever been (gained all the weight back +more, as usual) that I had a fun and active sex life. But maybe that’s because I’m a FREAK!]

    It took me a long time to understand that my FREAKINESS is part of what attracts the people I love best.

  18. :::unfurls personal freak flag — which looks suspiciously like a bright-purple, paisley Jolly Roger:::

  19. Hmmm…. And ‘F’ is often the worst grade you can get in terms of school.

    Also – Baby-flavoured donuts shaped like Fs plz!

  20. “Also – Baby-flavoured donuts shaped like Fs plz!”

    Yes, Fat Freak Fritters! I insist that someone create these immediately.

    Oh, wait. Hang on. I know how to make doughnuts. Will work on this tonight and send a photo to one of the mods.

  21. Freaks and Geeks! We are the real Freaks and Geeks!

    What annoys me are people (like in the art/music crowds) who think SOME forms of being a “freak” are cool, but draw the line at the fatasses. Here, it’s all good, long as you’re not a hater.

  22. Yay! Bring on the flags / badges / T shirts (for once, a website that we can trust to sensibly size things too!).

    And for our marching tune, can I recommend “Freaks” from the “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” soundtrack?

    (Long time lurker, slowly getting his head around HAES here)

  23. “Superfreak” by Rick James…LODGED in my head.

    I wish people weren’t so afraid of being unusual, different, or unique. It’s such a hairshirt for some folks, and it makes me sad. If I hadn’t embraced being freaky-deak from a very early age (and granted, growing up in a house where my mom thought it was cool that I ratted my hair up like Robert Smith of the Cure and wore black all the time), I don’t know that I ever would have come to terms with the way my body rocks.

    Aaaand now “Bodyrock” by Moby has displaced “Superfreak”.

  24. Oh, bother–should read “and granted, growing up in a house where my mom thought it was cool that I ratted up like Robert Smith of the Cure and wore black all the time didn’t hurt“.

  25. Okay, I just made some F-shaped doughnuts/fritters, but they’re not ready for public viewing yet. I need to tweak the process somewhat. I’m thinking maybe I should go with lowercase.

    (And yes, I realize no one else is interested and that I’m talking to myself. Why do you ask?)

  26. At the risk of being labeled a troll, I have to say that ‘you’re literally a freak’ is the only statement in the FAQ that strikes me as wrong. Because I’m not sure what is meant by freak.

    The freak that a diet works for? Okay, that I could see. Diets don’t work. The freak that stays the same weight over a five year period?

    That describes a lot of people that I know, many of whom had unhealthy eating and exercise habits and had the metabolism such that intuitive eating and getting regular exercise meant they lost weight and managed to keep it off. They don’t seem like genetic freaks: they’re average in most other respects.

    So I’m unclear what ‘freak’ is supposed to mean. Is that kind of metabolism rare? Is there an explanation of why ‘five years’ is relevant? (I mean, I can almost guarantee you that in five years I’ll be heavier than I am now, because I plan to have kids in the next five years. But surely that’s not what ‘diets don’t work’ has in mind. Is it that people go back to better eating habits? That they stop exercising? What?)

    It’s not that I think diets work, or eating well and regular exercise magically morphs people into a size 2.
    I’m not ruling out genetic freakdom, but I don’t know if that’s what’s meant.

  27. Cala, intuitive eating and regular exercise for the purpose of personal well-being is not a diet. The “freaks” addressed in the post are unusual because they’ve maintained their dieting-related weight loss. It’s certainly true that some people have periods in their lives when they weigh somewhat more than their typical set point, and that when they return to “normal” they will stay there. That happened to me, for instance — there was a period of time in college when I was depressed, not very active, and not eating intuitively. When I started reversing those trends, I lost a whole bunch of weight (over 50 pounds) and then I sort of got more diet-y. That was over five years ago, and my weight has come and gone over a range of about 30 pounds since then, but it’s never gone back up to the highest. Why? Well, that doesn’t seem to be where my body settles when I’m treating it lovingly. I don’t know how my metabolism compares to other people’s, but I do know that I lose *and* gain weight more quickly than many of my friends, fat or not. I’m thinner than I once was, but I certainly haven’t sustained the same weight for five years. On the other hand, many people don’t ever lose (or gain, for that matter) significant weight no matter what they do, and that’s another reason why diets don’t work.

  28. Cala, the idea is that a lot of people can lose weight on a diet, but most people can’t keep that weight off for more than a year or two. The percentage of people who lose significant amounts of weight on a diet, and then keep that weight off for five years or more is very small (under 5%). So the freaks referred to in the excerpt above are those who lost weight by dieting and kept that weight off for more than five years.

  29. Gotcha, sweetmachine. Of the people I know who have managed to lose weight and keep it off, it’s been mostly of the kind of weight loss you mentioned: found their way back to their set point, as opposed to ‘dieting below it.’

    Thanks for the kind clarification. It’s been seriously bugging me since I started reading the site, because I couldn’t figure out what was meant to be freakish.

  30. Awww, thanks Kate. I’m emailing you a picture of the best F-shaped doughnut of the bunch. It becomes a baby doughnut if you insert a King Cake baby in it. Or half a pecan, which is one of the standard substitutes.

  31. Chas Dean, I’m with you on the theme song suggestion. Particularly the line. “We’re not bad, we’re not diseased or confused.”

    I think that sums it up nicely.

  32. Interesting that you posted on this…

    I was musing the other day on those diet stats, and realized that I will likely be one of them, and it made me cringe in a BIG way, b/c the way I’ve treated my body shouldn’t be a laudatory example, it should be a freaking cautionary tale. I maintained a weight over my set point overeating to self-medicate depression. I gained a whole bunch more during a period of binging b/c it was the only thing that allowed me an escape from said depression. I lost it all thanks to the lovely anorexia “diet.” (On which I almost ended up in the hospital, eating not all that much less than weight watchers recommended.) I’ve ended up at a so-called “normal” weight that my body seems to pretty stubbornly defend, refusing to gain more than a couple pounds during lapses of binging or lose more than a couple pounds if I struggle with restricting.

    It makes me wonder how many of the other diet “success” stories are actually stories like mine. Because yeah, this is a weight I can maintain healthily, but I didn’t GET here healthily–I ended up here b/c it’s where my body wanted to be when not being abused. End. Of. Story. I wonder if people get so defensive about the “freak of nature” label b/c some of them are, in fact, doing unnatural and “freakish” things to stay the way they are, or did them to get there and don’t want to admit it to anyone else, much less themselves.

  33. Fillyjonk, thank you SO MUCH for this post! That statement, quite honestly, has always rubbed me the wrong way.

    I’m trying really hard to understand the FA movement, and one piece that I’ve always struggled with is mindful eating and exercise. I have never been particularly large– at my largest, I was size 12– but I recently started training for a half-marathon. As a by-product of this, I’ve lost weight and I think more carefully about what I eat, because I can tell the difference in my running the next day when I go for my run. I absolutely love running, and sometimes when reading articles on this site, I’ve felt like I’m kind of a weirdo for liking it.

    I do have a question– I get a great deal of satisfaction out of running (not because of the weight loss, I just really like it!) and sometimes I worry that FA might be a bit discouraging about exercise. What is the FA perspective on this, and how can I be supportive of others with respect to exercise without being evil and “shaming the fatties” as you say?

  34. Fillyjonk, thank you SO MUCH for this post!

    Oh shit, you’re not joking. vivelafat, you were joking, right?

    Have we somehow made things MORE difficult with the new icons?

    sometimes I worry that FA might be a bit discouraging about exercise.

    Or possibly we just have a reading comprehension problem on our hands here. In the “trying really hard to understand the FA movement,” you’re including some actual reading of the blog, right?

  35. Maybe they’ve always pictured you as a brunette?

    Update: Kate’s the blonde, FJ’s the redhead (currently), and I’m the brunette.

  36. Kate’s the blonde, FJ’s the redhead (currently), and I’m the brunette.

    Aw, isn’t that cute? We’re like Charlie’s Fat Angels.

    If I change my hair I’ll have to change my icon! Luckily that’s easy in photoshop. Also, the red is so great that I’m keeping it for a while.

  37. I’m a freak of nature and proud of it. Lost 60lbs 6 years ago and haven’t gained any back. In fact, I’ve lost another 5. If that makes me a freak of nature, then I wear the badge proudly.

  38. Related to conversation upthread… what percentage of the “I lost x pounds yadda yadda congratulate me” crowd do you think actually RE-lost those x pounds after many stable years at n minus x pounds? I ask because when pressed they often admit that they were always thin, but managed to temporarily gain some weight, and then lost it again — which is of course not freakishness, but a spectacular vindication of the principle that it’s just as hard to make thin people (or even less-fat people) permanently fat as it is to make fat people permanently thin. I mean, I just lost 40 lbs or so over the last couple years, but that’s because this is my normal weight — I just happened to gain a lot of weight very fast from Lexapro. There’s nothing unusual about me slingshotting back to the weight I was for years prior (despite multiple dieting attempts!).

  39. I think of “freak of nature” in a positive way. “Freaks of nature” usually have some outstanding ability or characteristic that most people/creatures/living organisms don’t have because if it were a common characteristic it would (of course) be ordinary. I’m a classical musician and when I hear “freak of nature” I think of someone who can do huge feats of memory, or do astonishing feats on her instrument, or who just “got” at age six what I am still working out in my fifties.

    The problem is when someone says that everybody can or should be able to do the same feats and there is something wrong with them if they can’t.

  40. Babyfem, FA is very positive about excercise. We just consider excercise as something to be done for enjoyment and/or overall good health, not for weight loss. If you want to encourage people to excercise without shaming them, say something like: “I run, and it makes me feel really good, maybe you should try it” rather than something like: “I run and I’ve lost some weight doing it, maybe you should try it” (because you could sure stand to lose some yourself you fat fatty).

  41. Fillyjonk, that’s definitely me – my set point is at about 180 pounds and has been for many years now. Just about five years ago, I had an Unpleasant Life Event that led to illness and weight gain. When I got over the Unpleasantness, I did the diet-and-exercise thing and went from 220 back down to my normal 180. At the time, I didn’t know about the whole set-point thing and thought I was the Diet Queen for dropping that 40 lbs so easily and couldn’t figure out why I had “plateaued” at 180 lbs even though I was doing everything right. Then I figured out that I could not eat ice cream and lose no weight, or eat ice cream regularly and gain no weight, chose the happier of the two options, and have “maintained” my 40-lb weight loss for five years.

    I’m sure that if I had taken part in some commercial diet program they would be describing me as a Success! Story!, when all I really did was get back to my normal.

  42. Becky,

    Soooo agree with you on FA & exercise. There can also be a challenge in unlearning bad habits like, “If I don’t lose weight exercising then the exercise is a waste of time and money.” My mom hammered that one into me about my youth soccer and aerobics classes, and I’m STILL trying to unlearn it.

  43. Ohhh! Can I be a freak with you? I’m a freak either way, but it’s fun to be freaks together….scares the mundanes more ;)

    The funny thing is, “fat feminist freak” has been a pretty good description of me since I was about 12 or so. And now I’m proudly raising the next generation of 3F girls! My 12 yo has pretty much embraced her inner freak, and the 7 yo was pretty much born marching to her own drum (seriously, she’s the child that none of the books are written about!), so we’re well on our way to securing another generation of scaring the social norms :)

  44. I ghost here from time to time, usually catching up on a couple weeks at once, so it took me a while to see this. I just have to comment.

    I had WLS surgery last September. I’m totally there with the FA movement as long as it doesn’t apply to MY feelings about MY body. I went from a size 26 to a size 10, and I’m still losing. In a lot of ways, I’m healthier–though if my mother had never started me on diets in high school in an attempt to reduce my size 14, I never would have hit size 26!

    I’m absolutely terrified of gaining this weight back to the point that I’m sure I’ll have to kill myself. I can’t face my family, especially my mother, as a fattie again. I desperately want to be a freak of nature.

    I know I need to deal with these feelings, and that it’s ridiculous to say I believe in FA for other people, but not for myself. Reading this blog helps, I hope.

  45. I’m a little late joining this discussion, but this is something I just thought of a little while ago and I had to share.

    If I mention that anyone who’s lost a significant amount of weight and kept it off for a long time is a freak of nature, someone always chimes in with some variant of “Well, I know at least THREE people who have maintained huge weight loss for years! What’s the likelihood of me knowing so many freaks of nature?”

    Uh… pretty high, actually. For example, twins and triplets make up about 2% of the total human population, making them freaks of nature. However, an informal poll of a dozen people I know revealed that every single one of them knows more than one set of multiples. All but one person had a set in their immediate or extended family. I myself know five sets of twins and one set of triplets– for those of you keeping score at home, that’s THIRTEEN freaks of nature.

    I only know three people who have lost 20%+ of their “before” weight and kept it off for at least five years. If we’re assuming that “successful” dieters make up less than 5% of the people you know (because nearly everyone has lost at least some weight on a diet of some kind at least once in their lives), that means maintaining weight loss is TWICE as common as twins and triplets, yet I know 1/4 as many of them. Hmm.

  46. I’m absolutely terrified of gaining this weight back to the point that I’m sure I’ll have to kill myself. I can’t face my family, especially my mother, as a fattie again.

    Beth, wow, I didn’t see this comment when you first left it. I’m sorry that you are feeling this fear, and I hope that hanging around her does help. I also want to encourage you to try to see an HAES-friendly therapist, if you’re not already. You sound like you’re in serious emotional pain, and you shouldn’t have to have all that guilt and fear put on you. Good luck.

  47. I’ve often called myself a freak of nature…proudly! (This is in reference to a naturally low pulse, blood pressure, and super high HDL.) I don’t quite get why someone would be offended by the comment. Most people can’t lose weight and keep it off. If you can, good for you, but don’t expect that other people necessarily can!

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