More Writing About Why I’m Not Writing

You guys remember how I said better women than I had written books while holding down full-time jobs and keeping totally on top of their blogs, so it shouldn’t be a problem? Yeah, turns out the key word there is “better.” I’m feeling really behind on the book (which is due Aug. 1) at the moment, so I’m going to focus totally on that this week, at least. (Well, I’ll be blogging at Broadsheet on Thurs. and Fri., ’cause they make me, but other than that, it’s all about the book.)

Best-case scenario: I get my ass caught up this week, and relatively normal blogging resumes next week. Worst case scenario: Normal blogging doesn’t really resume until August, in which case I’ll still drop in with quick hits and the occasional rant, but it’ll basically be Fillyjonk and Sweet Machine’s show. Which is a pretty fucking awesome show, right there, except for how they also have lives that get in the way of blogging 24/7. STUPID LIVES.

Anyway, I’ll keep you posted, but right now I’m in full-on panic mode about getting this book in by the deadline–and The Rotund murdering me if we don’t–so that’s where I’ll be.

Posted in Fat

51 thoughts on “More Writing About Why I’m Not Writing

  1. Good luck catching up! My orals are next week, so I’m taking an internet vacation, too. This might be a slow week, y’all.

  2. Good luck sweetmachine!

    SM, the day before my orals I came down with a cold and a 102 fever. It still went fine. I passed with high distinction, actually. And I am NO badass, really truly. You know the best thing I did? Schedule a spa morning the day of my orals. If yours are late enough in the day that you can do that, I highly recommend it. I plan on doing the same thing for my defense.

  3. Sorry, good luck Kate too! We will all murder you if you don’t get the book in by the deadline because we want to read it! (And give it as gifts to relatives who are on 1400 calorie a day diets. But mostly read it.)

  4. Good luck Kate :) If you start to get overwhelmed, just imagine all the people out there supporting you (both IRL and here) cheering you on. It probably won’t fix anything, but it might help calm the jitters.

    And best of luck to you as well sweetmachine…you are one smart cookie so I have no doubt that you will do well.

  5. Good luck to you both!

    My defense is July 18th, and my dissertation is, oh, 40% written, so I know where you are coming from!

  6. I sympathise deeply. I write at the speed of a dozy snail with a hangover. Damn, they want that MS quickly, even if there are 2 of you working on it.

    Good luck, both!

  7. Take all the time you need, Kate. We’re sure the results will be truly great. Personally, I can hardly wait to read the book!

    Good luck to everyone on finals and disertations and books and all your projects! Just relax and don’t pressure yourselves too much. Everything will be just fine.

  8. Good luck Kate! We all want to read the book when it comes out, so a little extra time to focus on it is totally understandable. Sweetmachine, good luck on orals. You’ll do great!

    (Probably a good thing for me that it’s gonna be a slow week, because I’m busy with end of term stuff and I need to, um, not be spending lots of time on blogs, which lots of new material would encourage, heh.)

  9. I would like to know who these mythic women are who manage to write great books, write great regular blog posts, and hold down full-time jobs simultaneously. They are making the rest of us look terrible!

    Do what you gotta do, sis. And good luck to you too, SM!

  10. I agree on spa days. I had my defense a few weeks ago and the day before I did a massage/spa day and it helped a lot. Defense went without a hitch and I walked in the hooding ceremony for my Ph.D. last week. Now I just have to get through the revisions and paperwork and it will be official. Next month, with luck.

    I’m looking forward to the book, Kate. Good luck on this week’s writing.
    And Sweet Machine, the orals will be fine–hang in there and good luck!

  11. I’m not going to lie. If the SP posts get a bit thin on the ground I will whimper a lot in my corner…but I’ll also get over it. Book deadlines and orals have to take precedence. Besides, we’ll appreciate you all the more when you get back.

    In the meantime, Fillyjonk? Dazzle us, girlfriend! I have no doubt you’re up to the task. And if you want a guest post or two, I’m sure there are at least ooohh…a few dozen of us who would be honored to help out.

  12. Good luck Kate! The chance to read your book is more than worth going without your posts for a while.

    Good luck with your exams, Sweetmachine.

  13. I wouldn’t so much murder you as come to Chicago to sit and glare at you. *grin*

    So wait, if I don’t write it, you’ll visit?!

    Oh, and good luck, SM, even though I’ve told you that off-blog (I think) and will tell you again!

  14. Kate–oy, I am right there with you. Draft of my book is due July 1–and I blog, and have the column, and a half-time job. And allergies–mustn’t forget the allergies.

  15. Aw, fuckin’ great… so not only am I a loser, but because I’m a loser I get to be the only one manning the blog. “Hey FJ! Good job dropping out of grad school and not having a book deal or anything particularly valid going on in your life; I just know that will qualify you to hold down the fort. NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING.”

    I’ll do my best, of course. But I haven’t even gotten an Aunt Fattie written for yesterday. In other words, yes, people should feel free to send me guest posts.

  16. GANBATTE, KATE! I’m totally rooting for you. And I can survive the lack of posts (…I think). Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee.

  17. FJ, the way I see it is, you guys have done us a HUGE favor by generating fantastic content that we get to read for free. You have no moral obligation to keep it up. Even fatties gotta eat!

    Yeah, you poor “loser.” You only have a great job most people would kill for and are getting married! Nopers, nothing going on there, not atall.

  18. Life happens — I’m just glad it’s good life stuff. I’m a bit of a worry wart. ;-)

    Good luck (to all three of you)!

  19. You only have a great job most people would kill for and are getting married!

    I do have a pretty great job. The problem is that I should do it more often, which tends to preclude blogs activity. :)

    I’m sure I can keep you guys mildly entertained, though.

  20. (looks – and feels – all sheepish)

    Well, I didn’t actually mean to hint that *I* should do a guest post…but if you guys happened to want me to, I’d certainly be both honored and delighted.

  21. NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING.

    Dude, seriously, no pressure. At least not from me. The blog will survive if we go a few days between posts.

    And Twistie, hell yeah!

  22. Best of luck, Kate. No worries about the quietness. We’ll all still be here when life is less pressing.

    Very quick “what Shapely Prose has done for me lately” testimonial: I haven’t gone clothes shopping in over three years because I get so anxious I just buy the first thing I see and RUN RUN AWAY. Since I’m going to America and yous actually have seasons I had to go buy essentially every piece of clothing I would need for 16 weeks away, because I don’t have a wardrobe, because I don’t buy clothes. It’s taken 12 hours so far, over two days, and day 1 STARTED with me finding out the fattest size I’ve ever worn is too small for me now. Before that would have been enough to send me home in tears, the end.

    In spite of this, I haven’t cried, run away, despaired for more than a few moments, or given up the quest to FIND A NICE BIKINI, DAMMIT. Primarily because anytime I started to think the problem was me instead of the clothes I could practically hear an army of Shapelings reminding me that I am not the problem, and that I shouldn’t get sad, I should get fucking angry that manufacturers only make clothes to fit one body shape and they want me to think mine’s not good enough. I had one moment where I nearly bought a top that was slightly too small because ‘I could just lose a little bit of weight to fit into it…’ and then the other part of me was like, “No, how about you dress the body you have?” Don’t tell me about revelations.

    So anyway, it’s been horrible but awesome, and completely essential for going away and it’s more than I could ever have done before I found SP. Thanks folks.

  23. *wild applause*

    Huzzah for Caitlin!!! That is really, really, really awesome. An inspiration to me, truly. And I love the idea of an army of Shapelings. :)

    Sorry if everyone knows this but me, but when are you coming to the US?

  24. Wow, all this stress. Good luck to people with books, defenses, and orals (which sound WAY more fun than they probably are.) I will be sitting in my office pretending to do work and hitting refresh on the fatosphere feed.

  25. Sorry if everyone knows this but me, but when are you coming to the US?

    And WHERE in the US are you coming?

  26. shinobi: “Good luck to people with books, defenses, and orals (which sound WAY more fun than they probably are.)”

    That’s particularly true in the case of orals. *snicker*

    (What, like the rest of you are NOT eleven-year-old boys? wev.

  27. So wait, if I don’t write it, you’ll visit?!

    THAT ISN’T WHAT I MEANT!

    Even though it is the practical offshoot of what I said.

    But I would GLARE!

  28. I really, really wish orals were as fun as they sound. (A Sarah, we’re all 12-year-olds around here!)

    I need to get me some of those FJ pompons!

  29. Caitlin, you are my hero. I hope you enjoy your trip :)

    And if you are around NYC way and want some free coffee/booze and hero worshipping, feel free to drop me a line.

  30. Good luck to everyone in their endeavors, and yea Caitlin!

    Don’t worry, just leave us a few open threads and we’ll take care of ourselves. :)

  31. shinobi, I was wondering how in the world a defense could sound fun, and I suddenly had this image of fencing (which i’ve never done, or even seen in real life) with a whole crowd of people yelling out DE-FENSE DE-FENSE like at a football game. *giggles*

  32. Dammit, I hit submit sooner than I meant to because the laptop almost fell off my lap. I was going to say that I have a Shapely Prose success story of my own this week: my kid’s picture was in the newspaper in an “action shot” of a Memorial Day thing we went to this weekend – not those little inch square pictures, the big “cover page of the local section picture that takes up a third of the whole sheet” kind. And what else was in the picture? Me, off to the side, with a weird look on my face because I was squinting in the sun, being all fat and stuff, in this ENORMOUS PICTURE. A couple of years ago, hell, a year ago, I would have been so mortified at it I wouldn’t have been able to function for a full day, much less even look at it, much much less be happy that yea isn’t it fun for him to be in the paper. But I looked at it, had a moment of “Oh, crap”, then thought well, so what? Everybody gets bad pictures of them taken sometimes. Ooo, I look stupid in a picture. Oh, how that will destroy my life. [/sarcasm] Big effin’ deal. I’ve been experimenting with becoming more comfortable with taking pictures of myself, so I know I can look good in pictures (even if it’s on an average of 1 out of every 50 shots). I know I don’t look like a dork all the time. I feel more comfortable with myself than I probably ever have, even 80 pounds ago. So I look at it, and there is a little wee twinge there, but just a twinge. Mostly, it’s yea my kid has a big picture in the paper, and isn’t that fun.

  33. There we go – free-for-all thread on what FA has done for you. And then we can all eat yogurt! ;)

  34. car, you said yogurt, which I swear is like the PeeWee’s Playhouse word of the day to me: bells and whistles and cheers start sounding in my head. I just had the most delicious dinner of early summer blueberries and strawberries with almonds doused in real, whole fat yogurt. The real kind that gets poured out of a bottle, not the nasty gelatinous fat free substance sold at most stores. MMMMMM MMMMMM! FA has helped me see that I don’t need a big dinner if all I want is yogurt! (Oh, yeah, I also had a bunch of green leaf lettuce doused in my BF’s homemade garlic dressing. Yes. Just lettuce, even though it has barely any OMG nutrients!)

  35. shinobi, I was wondering how in the world a defense could sound fun, and I suddenly had this image of fencing (which i’ve never done, or even seen in real life) with a whole crowd of people yelling out DE-FENSE DE-FENSE like at a football game. *giggles*

    There’s a New Yorker cartoon I’ve loved since way before grad school, of a bunch of men sitting around a table, and a woman in a suit standing up with her fist raised, and she’s just knocked one of the men down. One of the sitting men turns to the rest and says, “Excellent defense! Let’s give her the doctorate!”

    Kristin, I just started getting Fage full-fat yogurt. Ooooooh boy is it good. The really scary thing about fat-free yogurt is that after a while, it starts tasting NORMAL.

  36. Ah! I finally realized how addicted to this blog I am by my obsessive checking for updates this weekend. I was getting wiggly Homer Simpson fingers by last night!

    So, I am finally posting. Hi. You’ve changed my way of thinking. Love.

  37. As long as this is partly an open thread/testimonial conversation… Did anyone else not really know what they looked like before finding Shapely Prose/the fatosphere? I remember Susan Bordo putting it nicely in Unbearable Weight, and I won’t do her phrasing justice, but it was something to the effect that we are from birth bombarded with images of altered bodies masquerading as real bodies, and it’s in light of those that we learn to interpret our own (real) bodies, and how screwed-up that is. And indeed it wasn’t until recently that I could even see my own body as anything other than a disjointed collection of problem areas — ranging from the truly godawful to the not-entirely-godawful to the would-be-okay-if-it-weren’t-surrounded-by-godawful — without having any integrity or cohesion. So just the fact that I actually know what I look like now – not even to mention that I more or less think I look just fine – is really life-changing. I mean, really, it has to do with knowing and accepting oneself on a very basic level indeed. But I never had that before.

  38. Miss Conduct: “There’s a New Yorker cartoon I’ve loved since way before grad school, of a bunch of men sitting around a table, and a woman in a suit standing up with her fist raised, and she’s just knocked one of the men down. One of the sitting men turns to the rest and says, “Excellent defense! Let’s give her the doctorate!””

    Oh, please, PLEASE, where can I find this??

  39. shinobi, I was wondering how in the world a defense could sound fun, and I suddenly had this image of fencing (which i’ve never done, or even seen in real life) with a whole crowd of people yelling out DE-FENSE DE-FENSE like at a football game.

    Actually, I think physicists (or at least those in my boyfriend’s department) might do this. Not the fencing but the cheering. They definitely go watch their friends’ defenses, and I think they might bring signs. Dan made a plasma-cut metal D and a fence for his friend Beth’s defense.

    Fencers mostly yell “HIT HER HIT HER HIT HER” in my experience.

  40. They definitely go watch their friends’ defenses, and I think they might bring signs. Dan made a plasma-cut metal D and a fence for his friend Beth’s defense.

    Omg, FJ, I’m having a spectacularly shitty day, but this just made me giggle out loud at my desk. Active defense spectating ftw.

  41. OlderThanDirt, OMG, that New Yorker cartoon site is so much fun! Ironically it will probably cause me to procrastinate so much that I never make it to my own defense. :) Thanks!

  42. A Sarah–I actually considered posting a warning about the potential time sink qualities. And as someone who hates to shop and actually wants very little, I was amazed at how much I wanted to buy! Did you see the Roz Chast cartoon of Bad Moms Trading Cards?

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