Fillyjonk, Friday Fluff

Friday Fluff: 5-7-5

TropicalChrome just pronounced it “a lose all my faith in humanity kind of day,” and that’s the kind of day that Friday Fluff was made for. We get into some heavy shit here, and sometimes we need to lighten up. So in honor of this Craigslist posting, I declare a haiku-off!

I will write the first
haiku or three so that I
can explain the rules.

Use five-seven-five
to respond to the poems of
others in the thread.

You can write about
anything you want. Cherry
blossoms not required.

81 thoughts on “Friday Fluff: 5-7-5”

  1. Good news: The loss of
    My faith in humanity
    Is not permanent

    A tracking device
    has been implanted in it
    it will be retrieved

    But for this moment
    I would much rather track down
    chocolate ice cream

  2. Peggynature:

    That’s fine for my thighs,
    but what of my other parts?
    I’ve rubbed them clean off.

  3. @lexy

    Many remedies
    for chub rub out there! Google
    “anti-chafing cream.”

    You can also try
    solid deodorant, if
    finances are tight.

  4. Two paper wasps are
    nesting beside my back door
    I’m too hot to care

    One hundred degrees
    the dog’s tongue lolls and drips
    sweat drips down my spine

    Erotic enticements
    stand no chance against my desire
    for a frosty beer

  5. I broke avatars
    trying to get it to make
    wee monsters for all.

    I liked that quilt thing
    but monsters based on your I
    P address? Too great!

  6. Homemade cannoli
    I gave two to a neighbor
    just because I could.

    Whipped ricotta and
    mascarpone cheese with
    chocolate chips… mmmmmmmmmm

  7. Ah, I made it work!
    Check out the new monsters, y’all!
    Do you like this more?

    The “identicons”
    (those quilty things) were classy,
    so it’s up to you.

    Wait, I’ll make a new
    post about this so people
    need not write haikus.

  8. Lynne, they’re on the side
    under “recent comments.” Yours
    is a weird round bird!

  9. I am not working
    Because my boyfriend is here
    Being distracting

    But I ran teeny
    Little radium columns
    In the lab today

    Oh he left because
    The cool kids are having wine
    I have my spreadsheets :D

  10. i am currently
    craving brackish snacks so i
    will write about salt:

    the dark day dad tried
    to bake a blueberry torte
    and grabbed the wrong jar

    may so hot your sweat
    evaporates in seconds
    granules scrape your skin

  11. arms are not forklifts
    that need tables for balance–
    hey, I’m just saying

    that is what I’ve heard.
    me personally? easy.
    back that truck right up.

  12. Monster’s in the top
    lefthand bar: “Recent Comments.”
    I think yours is gay!

    (That is, she’s a pink
    triangle. Fitting tribute
    to California!)

  13. There once was a girl
    Who was Irish-Japanese;
    Limerick? Haiku?

    Lines in fives or threes?
    Both, she decid-ed, and tried.
    She found it a breeze.

  14. Elbows sweetly lie
    Forearms also on table
    Everything is good.

    People with their forks
    Should be nice to other folk
    People shouldn’t stab.

  15. I work the late shift
    Everyone else has gone home
    And I’m web surfing

    Monistat makes a
    Chub rub cream I really like
    Most drugstores sell it

    Can’t wait to get home
    Battlestar Galactica
    Will be on at ten!

  16. I’m running a bath
    And my bubblebath is called
    Sonic Death Monkey.

    It’s a silly name
    But fits nicely in haiku.
    Good night everyone!

  17. Today, it rained through
    sunshine; a thousand tiny
    tongues dot on my skin.

    Rainbows are common
    in Oregon–they laugh when
    we strangers point: awe.

  18. The weather channel
    poll says obesity is

    Not society
    not the diet industry
    just us, by ourselves

    This makes me sadder
    than all the pollen
    making me sneezy

  19. My heart will go on
    Until I throw up, that is.
    Where is Manilow?

    Side pedant note: If we really wanted to go groupy with haiku, we could have one of these as a renga. Renga is round-table poetry, which haiku is a shortened version of. In Renga, the first person does a haiku, the next does a 7-7, then the next does a haiku again, then 7-7, etc. Samurai used to do this as a drinking game. There are a lot of rules, but the main idea is to riff off of the last person in a clever unexpected way. Then again, it’s not very Friday fluffy.

  20. @ fj

    Got ur luvlee mail.
    Why do you guys always come
    When I’m out of town?

    @ Kristin

    Academics – heh.
    I have seen that excuse used
    in every season.

    Come to think of it,
    other jobs too. Then working
    makes me look stupid.

    @ all

    Smiles and fun and laughs.
    I can’t count my syllables.
    You guys crack me up.

  21. @ shoutz

    Come on shoutz, cheer up.
    You know the weather channel’s
    buds with FDA.

    Tune it out – besides,
    all their music’s ripped off from
    Pat Metheny Group.

  22. Rocking shimmy day
    bellydance is so much fun
    takes so much practice!

    Now I’m sewing shirts
    Do the projects ever end??
    Doesn’t appear so…

    So here I sit now
    Clipping, Snipping, Singing too
    Songs for Piggy Moo!


  23. Eight wee precious pounds
    bouncing on my pubic bone.
    “Cautionary Whale”

    every word, each line
    each thought, emotion, poem
    is about this child.

    8 months of waiting
    plus 2 weeks, a day, a half
    “are we there yet mom?”

    Two things I have learned-
    strangers comments never end.
    ice cream cures heartburn.

  24. bicycle shorts work
    better than the chafing gel
    in my opinion

    when i wore the gel
    it would rub off really fast
    and my thighs were sad

  25. I am proud to be
    A California native
    As of yesterday!

    What gel did you use?
    When I run a marathon
    I chaff everywhere

    In places that I
    didn’t even know exist
    Extremely painful

    But I have found that
    Body Glide is really great
    It works long and strong

  26. eggy baked pancakes –
    like the ones from childhood
    friend’s houses – for brunch

    found the recipe
    in my midwestern cookbook
    they are smelling good!

    3/4 cup flour
    4 eggs, vanilla, butter
    bake 25 minutes

  27. Off to see my friends
    From Indy, Wisco, Dayton
    In for the weekend.

    Must purchase liquor
    On the way to the cookout
    Hope it doesn’t rain!

    Logged out just to see
    My lil’ avatar monster
    Hope he/she is cute.

  28. My beloved Dad
    opposes gay marriage. Why?
    Illogical bilge.

    Surprise of my life.
    Inconsistent with all his
    values and mores. Grrr.

  29. hard soles, concrete floors,
    a lonely shift, twelve long hours;
    oh my aching feet.
    – – – – – – – – – – – –
    cold today, with rain,
    a dreary springtime drizzle.
    how i miss the sun.
    – – – – – – – – – – – –
    letter by ketter,
    words fall like cherry blossoms
    soft as morning mist.

    [ come on, someone had to throw in some cherry blososms… ]

  30. tonight i will wear
    my wedding ring to sleep in
    i miss my husband

    only three more days
    until i fly to see him
    and then fireworks!

  31. Epiphenomena,

    Probably thinking
    in the abstract. Doesn’t get
    it’s about people.

    Much harder, I find,
    to say to my face: you don’t
    deserve happiness.

  32. Sorry I was late
    For my opportunity
    To add a haiku

    I am quite a fan
    Of expressing thoughts tightly
    In 5-7-5

    It’s sad how I have
    Nothing of any value
    Regarding topics

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