This morning I woke up and discovered we’re out of coffee.
I decided to go about my day anyway and forgot about it.
Then around noon, I had a huge headache, felt all sorts of foggy, and couldn’t stay awake. Took some Advil but couldn’t shake the fog or the sleepies. I posted at Ask the Blondes, but I just couldn’t make my brain work well enough to analyze articles er nuthin’.
It took me like 3 hours to realize that was all because I hadn’t had any coffee. I’m working my way through a 20-oz. cup of White Hen Vanilla Nut right now, and everything is becoming MUCH clearer.
That is so goddamned sad.
And it’s all I’m gonna post about today, because I’m about to go for a walk with Mean Asian Girl and the Mean Whasian Baby, who is already even bigger than this:
(which is killing me), and then Al and I are off to meet Laura and her boy for drinks. I will be bringing Laura my too-small apple-pickin’ skirt, and possibly some other goodies that Lexapro and lord knows what else* have made my ass too big for in the last year. (If you’re a Chicago-area in-betweenie, now is a good time to make friends with me.) And I will be plotting to steal her awesome glasses. And I will be hoping we don’t have to talk much about literature other than Harry Potter, because — apart from being a philistine in general — I am SO BAD about retaining what I’ve read, you seriously would not believe I have an English degree. Even a little baby bachelor’s one. Seriously, every conversation I have about literature goes like this:
Other Person: Have you read ______?
Me: Why yes, of course! I am A Person of Letters, after all!
Other Person: Okay, so you know how when ____ does _____ it leads to ______?
Me: Um, I know I wrote like 3 papers on it in college, but I actually don’t remember a fucking thing about it. Hey, did you see the new Die Hard?
Laura’s all smart about books and shit. I’m somewhat concerned.
I definitely need more coffee.
*I mean, besides the calories I’m underreporting because I’m a big, fat liar.