Happy Birthday, A Sarah!

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It’s our newest co-blogger’s birthday, and she just moved to a town where she doesn’t know anyone to celebrate with. So let’s make the Shapeling party count: I want champagne and baby donuts flowing freely (inasmuch as donuts can flow), links to puppy pictures, limericks and revised song lyrics in our girl’s honor, chair-dancing, and all manner of rowdy behavior you’ll regret tomorrow.

And of course, the most important ingredient of any good fatty party: TWO WHOLE CAKES.

twowholecakes

Happy birthday, lady!

P.S. For your birthday, I might even get you a masthead with your name and picture on it, but don’t hold your breath.

92 thoughts on “Happy Birthday, A Sarah!”

  9. Here is some cake, and some more cake, and some more cake. *piles on the cake* Birthdays are all about the cake. Happy birthday. :D

  11. Happy birthday to you!

    Happy birthday to you!

    Your posts are an intriguing and valuable contribution to Fat Acceptance!!

    Happy birthday to you!

    (What can I say? I suck at scansion).

  13. Happy Birthday! I would have personally chosen a DQ Blizzard Cake–which I hope I’ve made clear to my husband that, if I don’t get on my 32nd birthday, I will burst into tears–but two whole cakes works, too.

  15. I am positioning my mouth under the doughnut chute while the Swedish Chef sings to me. BEST BIRTHDAY EVER.

  16. Happiest of happy birthdays, A Sarah! In your honor I’m creating half a dozen virtual cakes, an equal number of virtual pies, and a good half ton of eclairs, because you’re worth it.

    President Obama can have a slice or an eclair if he wishes, because I’m generous like that.

  17. Happy birthday A Sarah! Now please produce your birth certificate to prove you’re a natural-born citizen.

  20. Happy birthday A Sarah! While donuts don’t necessarily flow, glaze does sort of ooze so flowing, oozing baby donut glaze to you!!!

  25. Perhaps a foot massage to go with the doughnut chute and the Swedish Chef serenade? :)

    Many happy returns, A Sarah! :D

  29. Happy Happy Bday A Sarah! My bday was yesterday and it was super fantastic, so I will pass on the birthday torch to you and hope the same for you!

    (PS. Did anyone see “your moment of zen on the end of the daily show 07/30/09 — Magnum PI is on the trail to find a missing birth certificate in HI…such a good find.)

  32. Happy Birthday to you!
    I love what you do!
    Your snark is fantastic,
    And your sarcasm, too!

    Many happy returns, A Sarah!!!!

  33. To the tune of “Blow the Man Down”

    You say it’s your birthday, well, tell me who cares.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.
    We’ll tie up your feet, make you walk down the stairs.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    A cake with the candles all over the place.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.
    When you make a wish, they blow up in your face.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    Yo-ho, Yo-ho, Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    You’ll get lots of presents, tied up in a sack.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.
    And when you unwrap them, we’ll take them all back.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    But we love you; so don’t get us wrong.
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.
    Just wanted to tease you with this nasty song
    Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    Yo-ho, Yo-ho, Yo-ho, so it’s your birthday.

    (Lyrics by Heather Alexander)

  39. With hopes the lady will forgive the assonance

    SP has a new blogger, A Sarah
    Shares wisdom like a Substitute Mama
    Her wit keeps us in thrall
    It’s not shocking at all
    She would share a birthday with Obama.*

    *what’s a little midnight date stretching between friends? :D
    xp

  41. Actually that solves a problem I’d been mulling over: how to entice Obama to jump out of my cake when it’s also his birthday and he should by rights be exempt from cake-jumping-out-of?

    His birthday being tomorrow opens up all sorts of possibilities, though. Oooh, like a big fat Shapeling slumber party/joint b-day party at the White House!

    *grabs Kirk Cameron sleeping bag and huge tape pink tape player*

  44. A SARAH
    OUR LOVE
    HOLDS ON
    HOLDS ON

    A SARAH
    OUR LOVE
    HOLDS ON
    HO-OLDS ON

    (there’s your rewritten lyrics for you. Happy happy, A Sarah!)

  49. Happy Birthday! Every time I say that I think of Gus on Cinderella. He was so cute!

    I wish you the best year yet, and with many more to come, A Sarah!

  51. Happy happy birfday!! *looks around* Hmm… plenty of cake, plenty of booze… Oh! You need something to eat before the cake! Or after it. Whatever ices your margarita.

    *whips up two whole pizzas* Homemade, natch. Steaming hot, oozing molten mozzarella, with perfectly browned puffy crust that’s crisp on the outside and softly yeasty on the inside… aww yeah. One with meaty toppings and one with veggie toppings for the vegetarians!

  52. Happy Birthday A Sarah!
    Here is a present for you:
    birds of paradise
    trust me, it’s worth watching :)
    (amazing and funny animals, what more could you want?)

  59. I come bearing amusing tangentially fat related story!

    I’m studying to be a personal trainer, and we were learning about anthropometrics and (gasp) BMI. We had to calculate our BMI, and it was said that we (most of us are young athletes) would tend towards a higher BMI than we would appear to have. Our tutor, B., asked if anyone had gotten a score of less than 20. Three people raised their hands – two were former professional ballet dancers, but the third, R. is a six-foot, muscle bound Athlete with a capital A. He looks like exactly the kind of person who would get an artificially inflated score thanks to his muscle mass.

    B. was understandably confused. So were the rest of us.
    B: You got less than 20?
    R: Yeah, I got 17.9, I’m not sure I like this BMI thing, it makes me out to be massively skinny.
    B: Youre underweight?
    R: *starting to grin* Yeah.
    We all sat there confused as R. kept grinning. Then it dawned on us.

    Turns out there’s another group that BMI won’t work for – smart-arse para-olympians who weigh a lot less without their left leg.

  60. Okay, I’ll be honest — this birthday started out full of suck, but you all turned it around. Now it’s one of the best I can remember. The links and verse and video clips have me howling, here. I’ll have to make a point of reading this later, too, when I’m drunk. (And by “drunk” I mean “experiencing the effects of three-fourths of a Manhattan,” because in that respect — and that respect alone — I am very much a lightweight.)

  68. If you’re not a Stargate or Richard Dean Anderson fan, this probably won’t have as much impact, but the song is fun, if a bit macabre:

  69. Not only am I an SG:1 fan, I’m an Arrogant Worms fan.

    Considering I like to sing the silly “Viking birthday dirge”, I don’t think of this as very macabre.

  70. Happy Birthday, A Sarah!

    Please allow me to say that we have all been listening to you as you have been telling us of travails over the last year or so and I, for one, am very impressed by your perseverance and willingness to try new things.

    You are a successful woman.

    When you look back on this past year (if that’s what you’re prone to do on birthdays), I hope you look back with pride–you deserve it.

  72. I think it’s still your birthday, so I will sing to you in Hebrew:

    Ha Yom Yom Huledet
    Ha Yom Yom Huledet
    Ha Yom Yom Huledet l’A Sarah

    Chag la sameach
    vezer la poreach
    Ha Yom Yom Huledet l’A Sarah!

  73. Sigh. This community is as close to perfect as I think it’s possible to get on the web, and maybe at all. I’m really moved. Thank you. I’ve teared up so many times reading this thread today. I just… really don’t know what to say.

  76. DRST, another Arrogant Worms fan here! Love them.

    A Sarah, everyone else may have wished you a happy birthday, but I wish you a happy day AFTER your birthday!
    (please to ignore how I didn’t check the blog yesterday)

  77. Happy belated birthday from Finland too! Hyvää syntymäpäivää!

    And the song too:

    Paljon onnea vaan
    paljon onnea vaan
    paljon onnea A Sarah
    paljon onnea vaan!

  82. Happy Birthday!

    Adding more potato donuts to the donut chute/slide/canon/etc. They taste wonderful and are more accepting of us wheat-free folks.

    Wishing you a very merry unbirthday (with leftover cake) tomorrow as well.

  88. Happy birthday fellow Leo!

    Too bad you couldn’t make the party. There was lots of yummy food, too much wine and TWO cakes, a lemon pound and a chocolate fudge. But I saved you a slice of each.

  89. Well, shoot, Amy, happy birthday to you too! And to all the other fabulous Leos out there. And to our preznit, and Sarah Haskins, and my childhood bestie whose birthday is today! *blows paper party tooter and throws confetti*

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