Comments on: Fried eggs, boulders, and spaghetti straps

By: mishmish (was monkey, changing SN)

mishmish (was monkey, changing SN) — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 19:23:27 +0000

Coming back to this old thread because I feel it is necessary for me to apologize for comments I made upthread about the term transvestite and gender performance. They were made in good intentions and out of ignorance, but were still problematic and inappropriate and possibly offensive (really not at all my place to be saying anything).
I was unaware of the complex history of the term transvestite (including being used in problematic psychiatric distinctions among trans* people), and many layers of complexity to the “gender-performance” issue that make what I said not just inappropriate but wrong.

So I just want to say: I fucked up. I’m sorry. I’m working on it.

(anyone else who feels a similar need for self-education I suggest reading Whipping Girl by Julia Serano)

By: Samia

Samia — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 05:09:27 +0000

The rest of her language is bad enough, but transvestite-as-pejorative? Really? What hateful language.

By: faye

faye — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 03:41:22 +0000

Dude, I’ve been a 40B (B+, maybe ;D) for a long time and aside from the fact that my underbust is apparently too huge for anyone under a DD, I think my breasts look FINE. Twelve year old? I feel really bad for this woman.

By: alli

alli — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 09:27:56 +0000

so true! i just wanted to let you know, i linked to a post of your on my blog. i just stumbled across it today, and i love it. being a large bosomed gal, i always have trouble inding good underwear and swimwear. and not to mention all the boys who try to feel them when they’ve had one too many! how rude is that?

By: Zaftige

Zaftige — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 21:51:43 +0000

I’m just catching up with my SP, but SM, this is so upsetting. I had a recent experience with a costume designer who asked for my bra size and I responded, “42H.” She said, “42H?! That’s ridiculous, that doesn’t even exist!” I said, “Well, I certainly hope it does, because that’s what my bra tag says.” I wanted to strangle her through the phone.

And my posture is just FINE.

Harrumph.

By: OlderThanDirt

OlderThanDirt — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:49:04 +0000

About nipple coverage, I used to put a bandaid over them. I had very small breasts and very prominent nipples. Very prominent. Imagine a raspberry on top of the fried egg. I used to push them in a little before I put on the bandaid and that gave me the anonymous silhouette I was looking for. And this may be TMI, but I had to pluck the hair from around the aureole so it wouldn’t pull when I removed them. Anyway, it was very inexpensive compared to specialty products and it stopped the “Boy it must be cold! Har Har” jokes. ISorry this is so late but I was away this weekend.

By: Sweet Machine

Sweet Machine — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 16:56:44 +0000

I guess we should all be grateful for what we’ve got – at least I have four limbs and five senses.

Emma, I get what you’re saying in terms of being grateful for what you’ve got—but the second half of this sentence is pretty ableist. If you had fewer limbs or fewer senses, you’d still be a whole person capable of beauty and joy and self-worth.

By: i-geek

i-geek — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 14:27:37 +0000

Oh, but Saffy had her moments. I can imagine her completely snapping at, say, Patsy and dropping a few f-bombs.

By: ChloeMireille

ChloeMireille — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 14:19:43 +0000

Catrina–

You know, I’ve never tried to put a camera in there. I’m totally going to try this at the next concert I go to.

Mara–

I know you took back that post up there, but this line…

Your Breasts are Not a Fashion Accessory, You Fucking Moron. They are not in this year, out the next.

…was gold. My imagination has built an entire scene from AbFab around it, and Saffron gets to say it….minus the word “fuck”. You know, because it’s Saffy.

By: Emma

Emma — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:27:31 +0000

The obsession that women are taught to have with regards to the appearance and shape of their bodies is destructive to women’s self-confidence. You only have to go into a women’s gym change room or a public bath in Japan (or anywhere else!) to see that most fashion labels DO NOT cater appropriately for the vast array of body shapes and sizes around. I am very small everywhere (including boobs) and am constantly griping about how hard it is to find clothes to fit in the shops. I am especially embarrassed when blouses do up around my chest but are too tight around my waist and upper arms. I try to tell myself, ‘don’t be ashamed…no reason to be ashamed…don’t hate your body’. My sister, who from my perspective has a much more ‘normal’ size body also has a lot of trouble because she has big hips and a narrow upper body. There is no such thing as ‘normal’ though, and women (including me) just need to keep reminding themselves of that. I guess we should all be grateful for what we’ve got – at least I have four limbs and five senses.