Comments on: Happy Birthday, Al!

By: Charlotte

Charlotte — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 16:58:10 +0000

Grad school, yay! Welcome to the club! I’m starting my second year of seminary in the fall, I’m pretty excited. And grad school in Scotland? That’s pretty awesome.

Yes, my userpic is me, and I don’t know how I do that smile thing, it just kind of happens. But I’m glad you like it!

By: SugarLeigh

SugarLeigh — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 16:11:34 +0000

*hugs for Charlotte* Okay, so, I’m looking at your userpic, and if that’s you, you really gotta teach me how you do that thing with your smile that makes your whole face go YAY. Cuz it’s pretty cool.

Things are great, actually. Know why I’m distracted? I so totally got into grad school in Scotland and I’m heading to Dumfries in the fall!

I’m rly rly excited omg.

By: Charlotte

Charlotte — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 03:26:19 +0000

I’m glad to see you, SugarLeigh! It’s been a while, I hope things are okay with you. And I’ll take one of those hugs!

By: SugarLeigh

SugarLeigh — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 03:11:21 +0000

That first sentence made me laugh so hard! The picture is pretty incredible too. Happy Bday, Al!

*great big hugs to anyone who needs or wants them*

Man, do I ever miss hanging out here. I fell outta the loop a while back and can’t seem to fall back in… every time I come in expecting to have fun participating again I feel like a guest without a darn useful thing to say… I can’t even figure it out. It’s weird, because I still love everybody just as much. :P I think it has to do with a fairly large recent change in focus in my life. Anyway, hope it’s an okay place to say this, just wanted to let you all know, if my absence was noticed and anyone was curious: I’m fine, and nobody has ever done a blessed thing to offend me, I’m just distracted!

Ah, and RE: Father’s Day… we didn’t do as much this year. Had dinner at my sister’s house. I mostly spent it holding my nephew, and not so much with my dad. I’ll probably miss his first few years of life though, so I want to hold him while he’s still young enough to cuddle. And Daddy has already had a whole lot of my cuddles, so it’s time to share. ^_^

By: Sticky

Sticky — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 23:50:12 +0000

Also, Charlotte, I’m so sorry for your pain. Divorce is like death in a way. I know my husband still grieves his parents divorce that happened when he was 5. His mother left and moved across the country with the children, and he lost his father for all intents and purposes on that day. He has expressed to me that the kid in him that still wishes it could have been different, that fantasizes about the family that he could have had.

By: Sticky

Sticky — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 23:44:47 +0000

Kate, tears ran down my face when I read what you wrote. You’re so good at expressing things. My grandmother’s death WAS expected, and I thought I was ready for it, but I wasn’t. I felt like everyone wanted me to move on after the funeral, but I still haven’t been able to stop thinking about her.

I feel so much guilt for not making more time for her in these last few years. I feel like I should have appreciated all my moments with her more, and now that part of my life is over forever. It’s like a part of me died too. It made me realize that I will have to go through this again with my mom and dad, and I’m terrified to lose them. The idea of the first father’s day after losing my father makes me burst into tears. My heart goes out to those of you going through this.

Some of it feels self-absorbed. I feel like it changed how I feel about my own mortality. My grandmother had close to 100 children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, great great grandchildren. I held her hand while she died. I have no children. Who will hold my hand when I die?

It feels good to let it out here. Thanks for the space and for all the hugs and kind words. I think my grief makes friends and even some family feel rather uncomfortable. Even my husband who has been so supportive does not really understand why I am still upset. But I’m still upset.

By: Lu

Lu — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 23:21:05 +0000

I pass that stoplight every day on my way to work. From now on I vow to imagine your husband with his head stuck in there. Also, my dad has the same birthday. That is all.
:)

By: Charlotte

Charlotte — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 21:21:04 +0000

I know this is totally different that the loss of a loved one, but I still feel grief over my parent’s divorce. On the day the divorce was finalized (July 15), I do something to commemorate the day (usually i try to do something happy and positive). It’ll be 10 years this year. I know it’s not the same as the death of a loved one, but my parent’s divorce was an extremely devastating and life altering event in my life. I still feel the consequences today.

I’m so glad I can come here and stuff off my chest. :)

By: Stephanie

Stephanie — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 18:59:50 +0000

Oh, and happy birthday and Father’s Day and hugs to anyone who is birthdaying, a father, or grieving, respectively.

By: Stephanie

Stephanie — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 18:56:24 +0000

My husband is another ‘stop drinking pop and go down a pant size or two’ kind of guy — and the answer to ‘how much pop?’ for him, at least, is between 40 and 72 ounces a day. No joke. And at 100 calories per 8 oz, I can see how killing 500-900 calories per day might make a difference. If, you know, one has his metabolism.