Ok, I was a fat adolescent. There were times in my adolescence that I was unhappy. There were times in my adolescence that I was extremely happy. There was (as is) absolutely zero correlation between my body shape/size and my own measure of happiness.

Really, we’re talking about teen girls here. Teen freakin’ girls! Look at the flipside of saying that a fat girl can never REALLY be happy with herself (she’s only being DEFIANT or RESIGNED.) About the thin girls: does Ms. Marks think, “Of course she looks great so she MUST be happy? If she’s miserable she must be so only because she is being DEFIANT or RESIGNED” Besides being the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard…how twisted is that? Only skinny chicks in high school are granted enough deference by mental health “professionals” to be viewed as human beings that experience a gamut of emotions? Dude…WHAT?

I was friends with a thin, pretty girl in high school. One minute people were nice to her, inviting her to parties and the like. The next minute people called her a “slut” and “whore” and all varieties of things because she was thin and pretty. Sometimes it really hurt her. But she would go to the parties, often with me, who also dealt with weight comments that were hurtful..and imagine this, we would have a GREAT time. She and I would oscillate between happy and miserable…just like literally any and every other adolescent in the history of American adolescence. And not just because of nasty comments about her body/character. Sometimes ( like every other adolescent) she had family problems, or boyfriend problems, or felt stressed, overwhelmed and over scheduled. She was thin and pretty, and I was fat and kind of frumpy…but guess what, we were JUST ALIKE!

Anyone who equates the “sadness” of a fat teen ONLY with the “fat” and not with the “teen” doesn’t understand the concept of either and shouldn’t be commenting on anything.

But a note: We don’t use “retarded” as an insult/joke around here. It’s ableist and can be hurtful. Thanks.

“Am I pretty?”

“Yes, Kaitlin, you’re one of the most beautiful girls I know. But, you could stand to lose a little weight.”

I’ve spent the good portion of 15 years being ashamed of being fat. After I first found out about FA, I realized that I’m okay as who I am. Sure, I need to be more active and need to eat less junk (Don’t we all? ;) ), but I’m not a burden on anyone because I’m me!

@aebhel:

I have the same problem! I don’t understand the way that many girls in my school organize their boundaries. I’m socially retarded. XD

A fatter and more blubbery cow had surely never walked the planet! 127!!! That’s almost…. 130!

Now, fat girls surely face much more overt difficulty, but any doc who implies “normal” BMI girls are in any way immune from self-loathing derived from totally impossible beauty standards ought not be writing advice columns for the general public.

A man with confidence is a “go getter” or “dynamic” – and good on him!

My heart aches for the teenager I once was (and young woman too for that matter) and for those coming after me.

Once, in English, we were given an assignment to read a play. I went to the book store and picked up a thin book… a play called Fat Pig. As I walked out of the store, book in hand, my mom sad: “Lexie, I’m so proud of you. I would have never had the courage to do that when I was your age.” I know I’m fat. I want to read and learn and love people like me! I wanted literature that made me mad about the injustices that came with being fat. I want to be mad so that I can try to change the world. I have self-esteem and someone telling me I don’t just makes me puff my chest out more, smile wider, and toss my hair about in flagrant, oh-so self-esteem-enhancing, delicious defiance!

So very true. I have a solid self-image, but I find myself falling into this more often than I would like..