Comments on: Quick Hit: Fat Talk Free Week

By: Dominique Millette

Dominique Millette — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 19:30:54 +0000

btw – I wish I could edit my previous comment. When I talk about “getting a life”, of course each woman has one. I suppose I mean “giving yourself absolute permission to lead that life” is what I really mean. And that means flying in the face of conventional attitudes all around us. But it’s ultimately fun, ’cause it’s kick-ass :)

By: Dominique Millette

Dominique Millette — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 19:26:51 +0000

I see fat talk as a variant of appearance-talk, generally. It’s something women engage in more often than men because a woman’s worth is supposed to be all about her appearance, no matter what else she does or how else she defines herself. If I’m not mistaken, (cis) (straight) men are more likely to be overweight than women. They are less likely to dye their hair and get cosmetic surgery. They don’t wear makeup for the most part. They don’t “need” to do any of this stuff. Technically, neither do we women, but of course any lapse on our part in grooming is noticed immediately and judged harshly. All this is why I believe it’s far more important for women to target the meta-problem (how they define themselves, usually due to how they are defined) as a means of targeting the “micro” problem (specific references to appearance). Getting a life, with passions, hobbies and interests beyond “being pretty”, and tending to that instead of to the role we think we must fulfil, is a more effective way of eliminating fat-phobia, in my opinion. I believe once women care more about the rest of their lives, they are less likely to obsess about their weight – and the less they think obsessively about any one issue, the less the focus is likely to lead to unhealthy or damaging behaviours, either psychologically or physically.

By: Katie

Katie — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 00:37:36 +0000

It’s always a little up lifting to see things like this. Someone out there is still fighting for me!

I need it. I’m having one of those weeks. I just feel inadequate about my weight. I feel like I am too much. I don’t know why. I am not 100% accepting of my body yet, but usually I am much more okay with myself than I feel right now. I know I’m okay, so why don’t I feel okay? It’s frustrating.

I will have to show my mom this video. She’s a chronic “Katie, I need to loose weight!” person. It drives me crazy. I weigh a lot more than her, what does she think of me exactly?

Its so true, though. Fat women do stop engaging in life enriching activities. I’m guilty. I have been avoiding making a doctor’s appointment. I don’t want to be lectured on my weight. I just don’t. I am so afraid of going in and finding out there is something weight related wrong with me. I just feel like I would become so depressed if someone weight related was wrong with me. Because then it would be ALL MY FAULT, you know? It just freaks me out.

By: CED

CED — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 13:24:27 +0000

Hey Kate,

Thanks for the great entry on Fat Free Talk Week. Having a positive self image is a struggle for so many of us. It always nice to learn about ways that can help boost our self esteem. The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt is also celebrating Fat Free Talk Week and Love Your Body Day. They recently added an entry about LYBD and Fat Free Talk Week to their blog that highlights the importance of great events such as these. To read their entry click here: http://eatingdisorder.org/blog/2008/10/15/one-week-two-important-events-for-body-image/

By: maewyn

maewyn — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 04:58:36 +0000

Posted the video (and linked to the FoBT post) on my LJ. And I hope it makes a difference; several women on my flist are so strong and together, it breaks my heart when they post about what they’ll finally be able to do or how perfect life will be when they lose those 10 pounds.

By: tinfoil hattie

tinfoil hattie — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 03:54:21 +0000

1963: The Equal Pay Act gave women the right to receive equal pay as men.

Oooh, thanks! The Equal Pay Act “gave” me the “right” to receive as much money as men! I’m so happy. Wow. I never would have been equal if this “right” hadn’t been “given” to me.

Furthermore, if Speaker of the House is the best we’ve done in 220 years, I’m not impressed. We haven’t “come so far” at all.

And there’s your answer to why we buy into some stupid physical “ideal” that bears no resemblance to reality.

We hate ourselves because we’re taught to do so, from birth. No matter what we do, it’s wrong. Fat is just one of the easiest insults to use.

It’s called “patriarchy.” Having a “fat-talk-free” week is only necessary because we are drowning, suffocating, smothering in patriarchy.

By: LS

LS — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 23:17:27 +0000

Apologies for the off-topicness, but I want to share a piece of frustration, and this blog is the only place I can think of to do it. Lately I’ve been hearing a lot, in a policy/issue diagnosis context, about “diabesity” and it makes me want to scream. Can we not recognize a link without doing a strict conflation? Arrgh! And I don’t know how to call people on it without sparking a 20 minute (at least) debate. Help?

By: buttercup

buttercup — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 23:11:57 +0000

@Linda, I wouldn’t call it furor, at least not on my part. Just an eyeroll to the constant reminder that we’re only good for certain things in this world, like bearing children and being fuckable.

By: IrishUp

IrishUp — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 21:39:54 +0000

As a mom (very happy to be one now, HIGHLY ambivalent for the 37yrs that preceded it!), I was also mildly irritated at the childbearing thing. As the stepmom to a teen recovering from anorexia, it’s not just about having babies/periods.

If you’re sufficiently malnourished to experience dysmenorrhea and/or infertility, you’re probably also:

Too thin to lay in bone properly – osteopenia & osteoperosis, hello!
Too thin to maintain healthy dentition.
Too thin to adequately maintain and repair fatty structures throughout the body like, oh, the BRAIN.

Ok, maybe these are not as pithy as what’s in the video, but my larger point is that it’s usually a sign of larger problems when an organ fails to work the way nature intended it. For the next iteration of the video, maybe the makers can figure out a way to make that very salient point without alienating those of us without reproduction on our agendas.

By: Elusis

Elusis — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 20:53:44 +0000

Thanks Elizabeth – that’s really helpful! I printed a copy for the bulletin board in our break room, and snipped out the article to hang next to my fuzzy logo on my door.