Comments on: Do I Have to Find Fat People Attractive?

By: Christina

Christina — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 18:46:37 +0000

No, it’s not required that people have to find fat women or just fat people in general attractive but in the world we live in, people don’t just say they aren’t attracted to fat people, they’d belittle them and mock them. I think there’s a difference between saying you’re not interested and saying you’re not interested because fat people disgust you. Someone can find blond haired, blue eyed girls attractive but it’s different if you say you only like them because everyone else is sub-human.

By: O.C.

O.C. — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 02:40:17 +0000

I tend to find shorter men attractive, because I think that some of them understand what it’s like to be outside the range of what’s considered attractive. So some of them are better able to understand what a larger woman has experienced, because they’ve experienced some of it too. People rejecting them as romantic partners because of physical characteristics, for example.

By: Dan

Dan — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 01:59:14 +0000

So my predicament is that I am gay and find skinny guys attractive. Since I am overweight I cant ever imagine anyone been attracted to me because all I find is skinny guys attractive. Arrgghh. But it is starting to change. Funny thing is I never USED to like thin guys. So I think that your tastes can change depending on who you meet etc.

By: Constance

Constance — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:42:32 +0000

Oddly I just wrote about a date I had Saturday where there was no physical attraction (on my end anyway) because the man was large and had lied about his weight. Yeah, they lie about their weight too. I have a “type”. I’m usually attracted to men of average height and weight. This I blame on childhood conditioning. Since my favorite males were of average stature and size I tend to prefer my partners to be the same.

But that only applies to men. As I grew to accept and love my body I discovered my ideas of female beauty changed too. Where once only model physiques were thought beautiful, now I find the more fleshy form attractive.

By: Dorothy

Dorothy — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 23:01:42 +0000

I’m attracted to all different types, but with the exception that I also am attracted to men that are taller and bigger than I. I know some of that is cultural conditioning, when I was young you didn’t go out with a man that was shorter than you, but some of it was not wanting to be fatter than the guy I was going out with. Which is ridiculous but it took FA to make me see that.

By: Lyssa

Lyssa — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 20:27:25 +0000

Great thread..it made me get to thinking (and yes, I have a type, so I suppose I’m shallower than the rest of you..), partly because my type is always taller/bigger than me. I have never been interested in a skinny or slender man, which I suppose is my own internalized crap (I don’t want to feel bigger than my partner and don’t want to be in a relationship that is going to make me feel like crap and totally obsessed with my weight – I spent too many years being obsessed with it on my own.) Interesting points above about how youthful experiences can cause attractions – I think depending on what happened to you in your youth it can also cause things you’re not attracted to (particularly something traumatic that takes you to a place you’d rather not go.)

By: Liza

Liza — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 13:39:16 +0000

And not so much fades, as turns off like a switch

True!

Except a lot of the time if I’m already attracted to someone it takes me longer to fully realize he’s a douchebag. lol

By: AnotherKate

AnotherKate — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 22:07:03 +0000

Wow, this is an interesting thread. Thanks for posting this – it’s really made me realize how shallow* I am!! I don’t really have a type and the guys I’m attracted to aren’t Adonises, but attraction is either there or it isn’t, from the get-go. Sure, it will grow or fade as I get to know the guy, but I can’t force it if I like him as a person but am not attracted (lord knows, I’ve tried). I’m very envious of people whose attraction to potential partners isn’t based at all on looks, or who can find someone unattractive at first and then become attracted based on their personality. This is definitely something to work on for me, and yet I really didn’t think this through 100% until just now. Thanks again.

* yes, I realize that it’s not decreasing my shallow factor that I hardly ever post here and when I do, it’s all “me me me!” but thanks for the forum and the great posts. :-)

By: twincats

twincats — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 22:05:01 +0000

It works vice versa, too. If I am actually attracted to someone’s appearance right off the bat and I later find him to be a douchebag, the attraction fades.

I forgot that part, but it’s SO true! And not so much fades, as turns off like a switch (for me, anyway.)

By: Liza

Liza — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 19:55:29 +0000

When I’m attracted to someone it tends to be independent of looks, especially of body (unless you count Michael Phelps because, well, damn). I tend to very rarely be attracted on looks alone (again, with some Olympic-related exceptions) and usually I like someone’s personality which then leads me to find them attractive.

It works vice versa, too. If I am actually attracted to someone’s appearance right off the bat and I later find him to be a douchebag, the attraction fades.