Comments on: The Fantasy of Being Thin http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/ Sun, 22 Nov 2009 04:27:19 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Laurel http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-121744 Laurel Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:41:58 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-121744 While I've inherited the same short, narrow frame that's been getting passed down to all the women in my family since FOREVER, I still spent most of my youth keeping a running tally of all the calories I'd consumed that day/week/month in my head. When I finally got the fuck over it and abandoned the count... hey, whaddya know? I suddenly started doing a lot better at...(wait for it)...math! While I’ve inherited the same short, narrow frame that’s been getting passed down to all the women in my family since FOREVER, I still spent most of my youth keeping a running tally of all the calories I’d consumed that day/week/month in my head.

When I finally got the fuck over it and abandoned the count… hey, whaddya know? I suddenly started doing a lot better at…(wait for it)…math!

]]> By: Gnatterfly http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-121302 Gnatterfly Mon, 16 Nov 2009 19:21:47 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-121302 First of all, you are a damn good writer, girl! Have you ever wondered why they photoshop the HELL outta girls on magazine covers and ads? They are playing on your weakness of "When I'm thin I'll invest in cute clothes and make-up" They make it so you associate their products with being young, skinny and flawless. So, you go buy those things to make you feel more acceptable and the products and clothes are lousy anyway! First of all, you are a damn good writer, girl!
Have you ever wondered why they photoshop the HELL outta girls on magazine covers and ads? They are playing on your weakness of “When I’m thin I’ll invest in cute clothes and make-up” They make it so you associate their products with being young, skinny and flawless. So, you go buy those things to make you feel more acceptable and the products and clothes are lousy anyway!

]]> By: Hortus Deliciarum » Blog Archive » Holy Fatosphere Shitstorm, Batman http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117888 Hortus Deliciarum » Blog Archive » Holy Fatosphere Shitstorm, Batman Wed, 21 Oct 2009 21:45:53 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117888 [...] tags. When I found the Fatosphere, and especially Shapely Prose, and such marvelous articles as the Fantasy of Being Thin, it was a revelation. You fats out there are my peeps! I am [...] [...] tags. When I found the Fatosphere, and especially Shapely Prose, and such marvelous articles as the Fantasy of Being Thin, it was a revelation. You fats out there are my peeps! I am [...]

]]> By: Future of thin thoughts « the news with nipples http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117758 Future of thin thoughts « the news with nipples Wed, 21 Oct 2009 04:26:15 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117758 [...] of thin thoughts Have you read Kate Harding’s amazing piece on the fantasy of being thin? (Sorry, I can’t remember whose blog directed me there.) It’s two years old now, but if [...] [...] of thin thoughts Have you read Kate Harding’s amazing piece on the fantasy of being thin? (Sorry, I can’t remember whose blog directed me there.) It’s two years old now, but if [...]

]]> By: newswithnipples http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117676 newswithnipples Wed, 21 Oct 2009 01:11:03 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117676 Ha, when I'm thin I'll know what it is I want to do with my life. And I'm already in my 30s. Ha, when I’m thin I’ll know what it is I want to do with my life. And I’m already in my 30s.

]]> By: Jay http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117017 Jay Sun, 18 Oct 2009 04:00:41 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-117017 My fantasy of being thin is that I would some how magically turn into this bubbly outgoing person that was the life of the party, instead of the quiet, laidback person that I am who sits down looking around nervously when all her mates are up dancing and enjoying themselves. My fantasy of being thin is that I would some how magically turn into this bubbly outgoing person that was the life of the party, instead of the quiet, laidback person that I am who sits down looking around nervously when all her mates are up dancing and enjoying themselves.

]]> By: Stephanie B http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-112498 Stephanie B Sat, 03 Oct 2009 04:55:54 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-112498 This article made me shed a single tear. (So dramatic, I know, but true!) I have been struggling with loving my body for a long time, and I still have a goal in mind. I eat when I'm hungry, stop when I'm full, and listened to my body more than I ever have- I don't eat some "rich" (as my grandmother calls them) foods, jaleopeno poppers, triple layer brownies, etc., because I have IBS and they give me an upset stomach and sometimes the runs, NOT because they're "bad" foods. But if I feel like eating an ice cream sundae, I do. Because I've learned not to obsess over food, and have learned that NOT eating an ice cream sundae ever again is STUPID. OF COURSE I am going to eat one eventually. And if I feel like eating one, I don't make excuses. I just go out and get it, eat it, and guess what? I might not want to eat one for a few months. Cause I have learned that is just how my body works. Now I want to be a size 12, but not because I'm too fat at my current size 18, but because when I was a size 12 I was STRONG. I could run. That is what I want more than anything else. Fat may or may not be in my genes, but being a strong able-bodied female is. That is the only issue I have with my weight- and really, it is not even my weight. It is me! I am the fat person who sits around nearly all day and watches TV, and I can own up to that. So its stupid to hate myself for a problem that I created- I'm not strong because I rarely use my muscles, and that's my problem, not my fat's. So there is no reason to resent my size 18 butt, and the only reason to get it on my fan bike (bike with a fan? its awesome) is to gain strength, not lose weight. Sorry if that was rambling and random, it was just really emotional to read this and to realize I still had thin fantasy residue in my brain. Now I have to change that thin into strong, and the fantasy into realistic dreams, like running around my neighborhood like I used to only a few years before. :) Thanks, Shapely Prose! This article made me shed a single tear. (So dramatic, I know, but true!) I have been struggling with loving my body for a long time, and I still have a goal in mind. I eat when I’m hungry, stop when I’m full, and listened to my body more than I ever have- I don’t eat some “rich” (as my grandmother calls them) foods, jaleopeno poppers, triple layer brownies, etc., because I have IBS and they give me an upset stomach and sometimes the runs, NOT because they’re “bad” foods. But if I feel like eating an ice cream sundae, I do. Because I’ve learned not to obsess over food, and have learned that NOT eating an ice cream sundae ever again is STUPID. OF COURSE I am going to eat one eventually. And if I feel like eating one, I don’t make excuses. I just go out and get it, eat it, and guess what? I might not want to eat one for a few months. Cause I have learned that is just how my body works. Now I want to be a size 12, but not because I’m too fat at my current size 18, but because when I was a size 12 I was STRONG. I could run. That is what I want more than anything else. Fat may or may not be in my genes, but being a strong able-bodied female is. That is the only issue I have with my weight- and really, it is not even my weight. It is me! I am the fat person who sits around nearly all day and watches TV, and I can own up to that. So its stupid to hate myself for a problem that I created- I’m not strong because I rarely use my muscles, and that’s my problem, not my fat’s. So there is no reason to resent my size 18 butt, and the only reason to get it on my fan bike (bike with a fan? its awesome) is to gain strength, not lose weight. Sorry if that was rambling and random, it was just really emotional to read this and to realize I still had thin fantasy residue in my brain. Now I have to change that thin into strong, and the fantasy into realistic dreams, like running around my neighborhood like I used to only a few years before. :) Thanks, Shapely Prose!

]]> By: molasses http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-109195 molasses Tue, 01 Sep 2009 13:56:28 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-109195 Love this, thank you. It's amazing how much can be overlooked, neglected, forgotten in our obsession with thinness. It's not just that if you're fat it's seen as a problem--it's the only problem, and losing weight will solve everything. I recently was diagnosed with adhd (add in my case) and am feeling amazingly better with diagnosis and medication. And have spent time thinking about how it took so long to get this diagnosis, and why-- gender bias, etc. This post made me see another piece--every time I felt out of control, overwhelmed by chaos, I responded by attempting to control my eating. Looking back I can see how senseless it was--how could my weight make me lose my keys for the third time? We're so fucking conditioned that fat=out of control, thin=in control, that I thought I could diet my way out of adhd. Once I started getting this treated, I found I don't want to diet anymore--I don't need the fantasy or illusion of control. And then I found this site and it's helping me so much. Thanks for the site, and this post. Love this, thank you.
It’s amazing how much can be overlooked, neglected, forgotten in our obsession with thinness.
It’s not just that if you’re fat it’s seen as a problem–it’s the only problem, and losing weight will solve everything.
I recently was diagnosed with adhd (add in my case) and am feeling amazingly better with diagnosis and medication. And have spent time thinking about how it took so long to get this diagnosis, and why– gender bias, etc.
This post made me see another piece–every time I felt out of control, overwhelmed by chaos, I responded by attempting to control my eating.
Looking back I can see how senseless it was–how could my weight make me lose my keys for the third time? We’re so fucking conditioned that fat=out of control, thin=in control, that I thought I could diet my way out of adhd.
Once I started getting this treated, I found I don’t want to diet anymore–I don’t need the fantasy or illusion of control.
And then I found this site and it’s helping me so much.
Thanks for the site, and this post.

]]> By: Sweet Machine http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-108545 Sweet Machine Tue, 25 Aug 2009 19:41:16 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-108545 Jenny, nobody here is going to doubt your experience because you're thin. Keep reading. Jenny, nobody here is going to doubt your experience because you’re thin. Keep reading.

]]> By: Jenny http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-108440 Jenny Tue, 25 Aug 2009 03:32:11 +0000 http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/#comment-108440 This article really hit home for me--and I'm thin. But before you all start rolling your eyes at me, believe that I have lived with as much angst about my weight as any fat person. And I believe that's true for 80% of women (I guess the other 20% were lucky enough to have mothers who never talked shit about their own bodies?). We ALL believe that the bridge to our dreams, our true potential, our wildest fantasies, is built on a loss of pounds. That the REAL me is skinnier--no matter what I weigh to begin with. At one point I even did get super skinny--my "goal" weight (which was unhealthy). And i STILL felt every bit as "too big" as I had before. I discovered, over the years, that there was no amount of weight I could lose before I felt satisfied. And that's because I didn't really want to lose weight. I wanted the magical transformation I believed would come with losing weight. Is it any coincidence that upon becoming a happy, settled person for the first time in my life, I stopped paying any attention whatsoever to my weight? I honestly have no idea what I weigh (and I used to know the measurements of every part of my body). And I actually don't care. My weight has almost NO relationship to the real stuff of my life. If I gain, if I lose, who cares? Certainly no one. And now, thank god--not me, either. And the funny thing is that I'm closer than I've ever been to becoming everything I always wanted to be. This article really hit home for me–and I’m thin. But before you all start rolling your eyes at me, believe that I have lived with as much angst about my weight as any fat person. And I believe that’s true for 80% of women (I guess the other 20% were lucky enough to have mothers who never talked shit about their own bodies?). We ALL believe that the bridge to our dreams, our true potential, our wildest fantasies, is built on a loss of pounds. That the REAL me is skinnier–no matter what I weigh to begin with. At one point I even did get super skinny–my “goal” weight (which was unhealthy). And i STILL felt every bit as “too big” as I had before. I discovered, over the years, that there was no amount of weight I could lose before I felt satisfied. And that’s because I didn’t really want to lose weight. I wanted the magical transformation I believed would come with losing weight.

Is it any coincidence that upon becoming a happy, settled person for the first time in my life, I stopped paying any attention whatsoever to my weight? I honestly have no idea what I weigh (and I used to know the measurements of every part of my body). And I actually don’t care. My weight has almost NO relationship to the real stuff of my life. If I gain, if I lose, who cares? Certainly no one. And now, thank god–not me, either. And the funny thing is that I’m closer than I’ve ever been to becoming everything I always wanted to be.

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