The movement has to start somewhere, and even if it doesn’t get everything 100% correct at the start, the basic ideas are what matters. “Love yourself as you are”? Not a bad basic tenet! The rest is going to take some time to explain, break down and process. And if we don’t get the right message out to everyone – including people who feel outside the experience at both ends of the extremes – it’s not because those people don’t matter. It’s because this is the BEGINNING. Make your voice heard with a constructive message and help build the movement!

a) I think it’s interesting that some physical things I was experiencing stopped when I changed my eating habits. B) it’s fun to talk about recipes and the slow food movement and how farming practices affect us all*

Yes, and A can certainly be discussed under the rubric of HAES, if you put it that way — physical changes happened because you changed your eating habits, not because you lost weight. But at the same time, not everyone is practicing HAES, and we’re talking about acceptance, rights, and pride for all fat people, regardless of their eating habits or health, so even that discussion has a limit within the context of the movement.

B is just WAY beyond the scope of fat acceptance. Activism isn’t about what’s “fun to talk about.” I’m sure you can find friends within the movement who would be happy to discuss recipes, slow food, and farming practices with you, as friends. Hell, I enjoy discussing all those things. But that’s a whole different thing from putting those discussions on the agenda of an organized movement for fat acceptance. There are a million contexts in which to discuss those things, and this isn’t one of them.

I’m sorry you’ve felt alienated, Anonymous, but frankly, if what you’re saying is, “I don’t feel welcome because I want to talk about weight loss and slow food and recipes,” well… I can understand why you don’t feel welcome. You’re barking up the wrong tree entirely.

Oh, and back to your post at 8, this blog has a thin writer as well as numerous thin readers — both personal friends of ours and people who have identified themselves as such in comments. No one ever, ever said being thin is antithetical to fat acceptance. What we said is, trying to lose weight — i.e., not accepting your body as it is — is antithetical to fat acceptance.

I can’t believe I’m still explaining this.

FJ: “I often look, for all intents and purposes, like I’m on a diet, because I don’t eat fatty or heavy foods and I can’t eat much at a time.”

Anonymous: “I do not feel accepted by the FA movement because of how I eat (which I suspect most of you would consider a diet)(even though it isn’t, honest)”

I guess I just feel like you’ve picked a strange place to air these grievances.

1) I do not feel accepted by the FA movement because of how I eat (which I suspect most of you would consider a diet)(even though it isn’t, honest), and how I like to discuss that from time to time because a) I think it’s interesting that some physical things I was experiencing stopped when I changed my eating habits. B) it’s fun to talk about recipes and the slow food movement and how farming practices affect us all*

2) I have been directly discriminated against by some people in the FAM. It was years ago and I’m not going to talk about it. Do I still believe in the movement, absolutely. Do I feel like I’ll ever be accepted by the FAM, no.

3) okay, I do have to respond to fillyjonk, who said: “Anonymous, you seem particularly committed to feeling bitter and underserved.” (I’m assuming you’re talking about me, ignore if not!). Yes, I do feel bitter about that rejection, and yes, I do feel bitter that I’m not accepted. You can tell me that I am all you want, but when I read vehement posts (not necessarily anything that’s been posted recently, or here, ftm) about not accepting people in who want to be smaller than they are, for whatever reason, to me that says ‘no one allowed who doesn’t want to be the size they are’. For me, that’s just one more rejection, something I’ve had far more of my fill of than yes, than I deserve.

4) I’ve only recently come across this blog, amongst others, due to BFB’s Big Fat Index. Apart from Kate I don’t know anything about the other authors of this blog.

5) My mother is a 1st generation American whose parents came over from Europe on the Boat. My father’s family came over on the slave ships. Trust me when I say I’ve been brought up to be critical of my own prejudices as well as those of others. I was taught that people are people no matter what they look like, perhaps more importantly, that they’re people no matter how they treat me, and to always consider the source of whatever whomever might say to me. While I don’t feel the FAM can ever accept me, I certainly accept and promote it

*I’m really big on local farms and local food, and am always looking for farmers markets, and farmers who sell produce, meat, and dairy from their farms, et al.

If it happened to me and I truly believed that the leech-doctor was the only person who could help me and the leech doctor was adamant about the leech part, well, I don’t know what I would do. But it would be a really lousy position to be in, and I hope it doesn’t happen to me or anyone else. (I know it does happen, sadly.)

Heh.